JTL

CNY

2012-01-28T23:25:00.001+08:00

This Lunar Chinese New Year is very different compared to the past years.
After grandpa passed away, everything changes in this big family. The good thing is, it brought everyone closer than ever.
The bad thing is, watching grandma suffering from Parkinson disease just makes me cry sometimes. I hope she will be health. Just be health. As long as she's health, I don't mind if she doesn't remember me. Health, that's all I hope for her.
Of course, we did not get much angpao this year. But that's not the point. Angpao is just red pocket with money. There's just not much happiness in the family this year. The adults are constantly worrying about grandma. We, the teenagers kept our mouth shut and do our stuffs. Nobody dare to mention anything sad in front of them.
I just wish I'd have a Chinese new year just like last year, again. But god knows it's highly impossible.
Don't worry. I'm not sad. I chose to face the truth.

Parkinson.

2012-01-23T19:27:00.001+08:00

It's somehow heart breaking realizing that the one who's been the head of the entire family pass away.
It's even heart breaking watching the one who's been left behind suffering from the disease of Parkinson constantly.
Her hands were trembling. A massive weight lose is noticeable. She constantly suffer from memory loss. She has to sit on a wheel chair. She can no longer stand on her feet and walk like she used to, do daily activities like she used to. I have not taste her delicious and mouth watering food for years. She has loss her confidence.
I hope that I can help her in anyways. But I can't take away the pain she's suffering right now.
I don't ever want her to leave us. I don't wanna go through the pain of losing anymore. I just hope this family stays where it is, forever.
If there is anyway I can help you, grandma, I will. I just want you to live, happily. That's all I hope to see in you.

Swearing all day long

2012-01-18T22:07:00.001+08:00

Today might be the day which I swear vulgar words the most. I've never Been so pissed.
First of all, it was him. He used me as a starter in order to scold the whole class. Of course I felt fucking humiliated. I wanted to cry so fucking badly. But I managed to pull myself together. You can't take this as a whatever the fuck it is okay. I fucking love it and you go and fucking crush my confidence in it. Of course I studied it.
I am not as smart as my classmates. I need to study very fucking hard in order to get an A+ for my forecast. You don't know how much I've sacrificed in the past. So do not ever pick on a person as a starter so you can scold the whole class. You did it with no intentions. But you're secretly killing my confidence inside. Do you know how fucking hard it is for a person to pick up the confidence they've built for years? Congratulations. You just crushed mine. That's the main reason why I swear so much. Cause you fucking make me insecure about myself and everything in my life. I felt insecure and I felt helpless. That's why I swear. So that people will stay away from me and not crush me anymore. You're a fucking adult already. You should know.
Secondly, I'm seriously disappointed in myself. How can I make such stupid mistake? I know I ain't clever at all. I studied a thousand times in order to get where I am today. A lot of hard work had been paid off. I guess it's just not enough yet. Everyday I try to convince myself, I constantly try to motivate myself. But secretly I know that the insecurity will never go away. It will constantly mocking my life like nobody else's business. I hope that one day I'll find my way in life, I'll find a purpose, a job that I love in life. I hope my find my real self someday and realize that with that, I'm beautiful enough.
The reason I don't communicate with my classmates much is because I'm lacking of confidence. I felt like I'm not good enough comparing with them. They are fucking smart. So I felt a great sense of pressure around me. I rather be invincible than being look down on. That's the last thing I want from my new friends, to think that I'm not good enough to be their friends.
Living alone ain't fun at all. You constantly feel the stress around you. You have to stress about money, studies, food, house, room... Everything. If I have a chance again, I'll be 17 again and stay that way. I don't care if I have to retake how many times of SPM. But I can't in real life. Life goes on and I'm growing up too. Of course you'll face obstacles in every stage of your life. You just have to get used to it. But I'm not ready yet you know.
Everybody has their secret. Mine would probably be the word insecurity.

F.A.M.I.L.Y

2012-01-15T22:08:00.002+08:00

It's weird that some of the teenagers actually hate their family. Without them, who are you? Without them, you wouldn't be able to survive at all. Without them, you are nothing.I actually feel blessed I'm born in this ordinary yet unordinary family. We're simple as ABC. We live a very simple life. That's what make this family special. SIMPLE. Sometimes the more complicated you make your life, the more you suffer. So why not simple?I am grateful cause everytime I ask for help from them, they never say NO. Same as me. I will never say no to them. Without them, I can't survive a day. Without them, I will never go to college. Without them, there's no me. So THANK YOU!<3 ILOVEYOU!

Untitled

2012-01-11T21:20:00.001+08:00

Imagining you have to unfriend your best friend because of his/her other half.
Living in this city alone is not as easy as I think so. It's not as fun as I imagine. And so when I found out there's Ipoh friends here, I kinda depend on them. I never knew it is gonna be that hard.
For all this years, I've always wanted to go to college. I'm always excited about it. But everyday I go to college with butterflies in my stomach. I'm afraid to sit alone, I'm afraid I do not see any familiar faces, I'm afraid of being bullied. I really am. Call me a coward I don't care. I've always Been insecure. Since I was little. So when I offer a friendship, I treat it well. Those who does not appreciate it at all, you can just turn to the left and never appear in my life again.
I know there are some amazing people out there. I just need to find 'em.

Arrival

2012-01-08T12:24:00.001+08:00

So yesterday was quite a fun day for me. I gotta do all those things alone. Doing things alone just taught me how to survive alone where there are no friends and family around.
Today is gonna be a better day though. Friends are arriving. Finally! I've been waiting. :).
Alright! Off I go! Everyone, stay positive. Cause that's what kept me going.

Exploration

2012-01-07T10:28:00.001+08:00

Realize I am gonna do more blogging than ever.
Reason being is I don't feel like writing my daily routine on Facebook for everyone to get all judgmental and judge my life.
The second day being in the city. Last night, I talked to a great friend of mine. Told her all my problems and she actually did help me in a lot of ways. (If you are reading this, I think you will be a pretty good psychologist.)
So today, I ain't gonna stay in my room all day. I'm gonna do some exploration. (Fingers cross that I don't get lost!) maybe meeting some new people in town? Or even better, watch a movie alone!:)
Today is gonna be a great day. Why? Because I believe so.

First night at this oh-so-awesome-yet-so-creepy city

2012-01-06T16:45:00.001+08:00

I can't believe. For all these years, I've wanted to go to college so badly and start all over again. The day has finally arrive.
I didn't feel happy about it. I felt scared and lonely.
The main reason is I'm staying alone without any friends. This leads to meeting new housemates(which I doubt they will all like me) and also walking to college alone everyday.
Moreover, I miss my bed! This new bed just doesn't seem right to me/for me.
Maybe I haven't got used to all these stuff, yet.
Everything is so new. It's like starting a new life here.
Honestly, I am really not good at meeting new people. I'm really scare they will judge. Well, everyone judge.
The first night in this city. How will it turn out?

14/11/2011

2011-11-17T20:29:00.001+08:00

When most of the people sees the date, they spells horror! Well, it's because they are SPM candidates.
Luckily, this year is my turn.(Finally!)
I can't say that I did very very well. I did well. But not too well. Well, I did okay for the first week. Although I got a lil panicky and all but I manage to pull myself together. All I can say is, I underestimated the government. Seriously, salute! LOL.
One week down, three more weeks to go! I believe I can! I believe to achieve! And I will achieve.
Till next time.:)

Pre Graduation

2011-11-08T07:05:00.001+08:00

This is it. The day I've been waiting my whole life. Yet a sense of sadness came rushing towards me when it arrives.
Graduation Day.
For the pass five years I've been thinking how my graduation will be like. Then I realize, it'll definitely be out of my expectation.
School. A place full of memories. Every corner of school has a story. We've been thru some rough parts and of course happiness in the school.
Some day when we turn around and look back our past, high school will be the one we'll remember the most. Cause it is the happiest days of our lives.
After today, there will be no school for us, there will be no teachers for us, there will be no classrooms, staff rooms, canteen for us.
There will only be college, lecturer, lecture hall, office, and cafeteria for us.
Take a minute and go thru every bit of your life as a high school student. You're gonna need them someday.:)
Before I get out of the car and face the music, I want to tell everyone that whatever life throws at you, always stay strong and persevere. Cause it is the only way for you to overcome the barrier ahead of you. Never give up and never say never.

Happy Graduation Form 5s' 2011!!!

Love,
JTL

最后一堂课

2011-11-03T10:04:00.001+08:00

在二十个小时前，我们上了最后一堂的华语课。那可说是最短但影响最深刻的华语课。
她说，以往的最后一堂课，她的学生都会收到一些小礼物。
今年却有一点不同。我们并没有礼物或巧克力。但我们得到的，却往往比礼物来的多。
人生真的很短。做人不要太执着。金钱不是一切。十个A更加不是。有些事情是可以放开的。一切都可以放弃。不要太冲忙地去达成梦想，目标。凡是都慢着来。享受过程，不论结果好与坏。。。
在短短的十分钟内，她告诉我们的不是考试范围内的提示，而是做人的道理。我很肯定地对世界说，在我国很难找到为华语鞠躬尽瘁的好老师。
她从不为好成绩而教书。她是为传教母语而教书的。为了我们的母语，华语，她付出的，往往比我们想象中的多。

她成功地把我们对华语的思想改正了。她也成功的把从来不认为自己的华语很好的人，感化了。
她让我们知道，若身为黄皮肤的华人不学好母语，为了得到好成绩而放弃华文课，母语将会永远消失。
从今以后，我没有华语课上了，但我却会说口流利的华语；我不可能像九把刀一样成为小说家，但起码我写得出一篇短文，写得出一手好汉字。
我承认我是个蛮偏向西方国家的人，但我永远都不会忘记，披在我身上的皮是黄色的。我是个华人。

在那短短的十分钟内，她深深感动了学生，也教会了我们人生的道理。

谢谢您，乡老师。

SPM

2011-10-29T11:01:00.001+08:00

How important is SPM? It's really important for those who intend to score straight As'. Without that piece of paper, you can't go far.
And who says that?!
No! People with not so good result gets a pretty amazing job too. Look at Bill Gates. He did not get first place in class and now he's a world known billionaire.
I might not be a billionaire. I might not be Taylor Lautner's wife. I might not be Bruno Mars or even Oprah.
I just wanna be Teh Junyi aka JTL. Cause I know I'm special in my own way. I wanna do things I like. I wanna have a job that I truly love, and that money isn't that important.(Truth is, money is really important when you decided to start a family with your other half)
The first step is, SPM. SPM is the first step to the rest of my life. I intend to score in SPM. I have faith. So pray hard, work harder. Go go go!

Wishing everyone whose taking SPM the best of luck.

JTL

College? Enrollment?

2011-10-24T23:31:00.001+08:00

How important is college? For most of us, it's pretty much our beginning to eternity. Once we're enrolled in college, there's nothing to worry about.

If you have determination, no matter which college you're enrolling, you will still get flying colors result. I'm not afraid of it. I want to be able to party hard while I study hard during college. I believe I can. I don't want my college life to be surrounded by books, books, books and books only. It's supposed to be the time of our life. So make it count. Don't live with regrets.

Scenery. Feeling.

2011-10-23T17:40:00.001+08:00

When you look at this picture, what do you see?
You see sun, trees, lake, and the sky.
At least, that's what every one sees.

For me, this picture is special. It's been captured at a very special moment.
I was on my way back to Penang for my grandpa's funeral. All of the sudden, I saw the sun setting. My eyes kept looking at it. It was too beautiful for my eyes to leave. I waited for a perfect moment and captured this astonishing scenery.
Apart of me thinks that by looking at this picture, I know grandpa is in good hand of Buddha. I've never seen such beautiful sunset in my life.

Sometimes, slow down your footsteps and look up to the sky. You'll be amazed by how much you've been missing out.

JTL

Invincible

2011-10-23T10:54:00.001+08:00

I take these pills to make me thin
I dye my hair, and cut my skin
I tried everything, to make them see me
But all they see, is someone that's not me

Here inside, my quiet hell
You cannot hear, my cries for help
I tried everything, to make them see me
But every one, sees what I can't be

Sometimes when I'm alone
I pretend that I'm a queen
It's almost believable

Even when I'm walking on barb wire
Even when I sat myself on fire
Why do I always feel invisible, invisible
Everyday I try to lock my past
Even though inside I'm such a mess
Why do I always feel invisible, invisible

- Skylar Grey

Grown up.

2011-10-23T00:45:00.001+08:00

Looking back my photos from year 2007 till 2011. Realize that I've grown a lot. From this super fat girl to a slim down girl(I did it cause some asshole broke my heart. I realize I need to thank him a lot) and now to a medium size me. I cried by just looking at the pictures. Realizing how much I've grown into this person today really does felt good. This cute lil girl has gone. Her look shows maturity. After another five Years, I will look at this post and laugh again knowing that how much I'm gonna change since today.

This is real. This is me. This is life.

JTL

九把刀

2011-10-22T18:55:00.001+08:00

不知觉，在短短的五天内，我竟拿着我的手机，把九把刀的两本爱情小说，≪那些年，我们一起追的女孩≫和≪月老≫看完了。（应该说我从未这么快把两本小说看完）
说实在的，我从未知道谁是九把刀。当我把≪那些年≫一字不漏地看完时，我已深深地被他那流利的文笔给吸引了。
≪那些年≫说的是九把刀那真实的爱情故事。他应该是我看过最会为爱付出的男孩。我想，现在的男生不是没耐心就是个大混蛋。只会把爱情当儿戏玩。若我是当时的沈嘉宜，我最终选择会是柯景腾。
在看完了那本小说后，我已大概知道九把刀的一切了。
至于≪月老≫呢，它让我见识了伟大的爱情是可跨越阴阳世界的。
若在西方世界，我最爱的爱情小说家是Nicholas Sparks，那在东方世界就一定会是九把刀了。
九把刀，请不要停止写出肺腑人心的伟大爱情故事。

JTL

High School

2011-10-22T07:01:00.003+08:00

High School.
For some people, high school's a nightmare and they can't wait till it's over.
For me, High School owns the biggest part of my teenage life.
Full of laughters, dramas, struggles, fears, fights, arguements, tears, fun!, happiness and friendships.
I used to be a real timid person during primary school.
I don't really know the meaning of friendship, not until I was standard 6.
During freshman year, Thank god I met a bunch of true and awesome friends. They taught me that nothing lasts forever and one day, we will be parted, to pursue our dreams. They will soon be just another chapter of my life.
Oh! and we were the cause of a lot of dramas. (THRILLING) After every dramatic drama(dramas are always dramatic), we actually learned something from it.
It's not something you learn from books.
It's the lesson of life.
Thanks to them, I know where I'm heading to and never get lost in high school.

There comes this girl.
When we first put on our ballet flats, never in the world will I imagine 13 years of friendship with her.
We've backstabbed each other, hated each other, fooled each other, and of course we've loved each other very much.
Fate is a strange thing.
It drives people apart and gets people back, closer than ever.
That's what happen to us.
Till now, what you see is what you get.
You'll never feel the strong bond between us. No one could. You have to feel it yourself to know it.
We will net catch grenades for each other(cause it's stupid to put risk of your own life when life is precious) but we will always be by each other's side no matter what.
I'm blessed, to get the chance to feel it myelf.

After High School, people starts to think, what's the next step for them.
For me, I've done all this BullShit many times.
When High School is really coming to an end, I started have flashbacks.
The first day of School, the first people I met, the first thing I ate at school canteen, the first teacher, the first deskmate...
Every FIRST became sweet memories.

On the day we Graduate from High School, most of us will cry. I know I will.
It symbolizes High School has come to an end. Do not cry for that.
Instead, cry for you're closing the greatest chapter in your life and ready to start the next chapter of life.
Life is about looking forward.
Sometimes you can look back. When you look back, do not have any regrets. Everything happens for a reason. God will not give you a question without a solution. Regret is the last thing you should ever have.
When you look back, feel every moment of it, no matter it is happiness or sadness. Every story has its beauty.
Behind every friendship, there's a story.
Tressure the past and go along to the road in opening the next wonderful chapter in life.

To every people who's still in my life or had been in my life,
Do not be afraid of what life throws at you next.
Do not fear of being yourself.
Do not give up.
I have no freaking idea what will happen to everyone of us, our friendships, or our future.( I ain't no god. )
If our friendship ends in High School, that's alright. It means our fate has end. But need not to be sad. When you lose something in life, you get something better in return.
If our friendship stays unchange, we're just being lucky. We've been blessed by god. I hope it stays that way.
No matter who you are, THANK YOU FOR BEING IN MY LIFE AND MAKING IT WONDERFUL.

High School.
People always say it's the greatest chapter in life.
They got it right. It IS the greatest chapter of my life.
What about you? Do you feel the same? I hope you do.=D

JTL

LOVE

2011-10-22T06:37:00.003+08:00

Love.
What is love to you?
What is love for you?
Without love, Life's life without love?

How many of you really know the meaning of love?
Love isn't a simple word to say.
It takes courage to say it out loud.
It is what you feel inside, in your heart.
But when you feel love, It is the happiest thing alive.
So, are you sure you know love again?

Love is about sacrifice.
Love is not what you see in the movies.
Its not the ecstasy its not what you see in that scene you know what I mean?
I´m telling you right now true love is sacrifice.
Love is thinking about others before you think about yourself love is selfless not selfish.
Love is God and God is love.
Love is when you lay down your life for another whether for your brother your mother your father or your sister its even laying down your life for your enemies that´s unthinkable but think about that.

Love is true.
Love is patient love is kind.
It does not envy it does not boast it is not proud.
It is not rude it is not self-seeking it is not easily angered it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects always trusts always hopes it always perseveres.
Love never fails.
Love is everlasting its eternal it goes on and on it goes beyond time love is the only thing that will last when you die but ask the question why?
Do you have love?

Now are you willing to lay down your life for your friends?
You´re probably willing to lay down your life for your mother your father or your best friends but are you willing to lay down your life for even those that hate you?
God is true love and if you don´t know this love now is the time to know perfect love.

JTL signing off

The Lowest Point in 17 years of Living Life.

2011-10-19T00:06:00.006+08:00

Where should I start? It's been months since I'm back to blogging. I realize I have to do this more often as Facebook is a world as scary as the reality world.
It's been a rough start for me this month as I came across a shocking news that my grandpa was not going to make it through the night. It was 2/10/11, 12.56pm to be exact. At that instant, it literally stunted me. I immediately said a prayer to him, hope he'd be able to hear me and stay strong for his family. Tears can't stop rolling down my cheek. I was having a downpour, thinking I haven't seen him for just a month and now he's dying. Thinking of how he used to smile and laugh sitting on his chair with us and watch his favourite hokkien tv series(he watches all the shows on channel 333 and knows all of the stories.). He always tell us stories of the drama series and he remembered every bit of it.
Things of him that I remembered the most is his cute, amazing smile. His teeth was perfectly seen whenever he smile. His smile stays in my heart till I die.
My sister once told me that when I was 15, I went back to Penang with a bunch of my BFFs after I took my PMR results. I was the happiest person alive on that day. The one thing I didn't know back then was my grandpa asked my sister about my results and she said straight A's. My grandpa shouted "hou(good in hokkien) hou hou!" with two thumbs up high. My sister said he was so happy and with his wide smile, it made everything perfect.
If I knew he would be gone at this time, I would have had put my revision aside for awhile and have diner with him.
If I knew he would be gone at this time, I would have had sat next to him more often.
If I knew he would be gone at this time, I would have had said I love you to him earlier and not say it when he's lying on the ICU bed.

Life is unpredictable. The second before you might be here, the next you might be gone.
I watched the nurse pulled out the support system out of his mouth and watched his pulse get weaker little by little. I saw him, lying there and would never wake up to see my face again. I would never see his laughter again. Every thinking, every what-ifs ran into my mind. All I could do was cry. I ain't a doctor. I ain't god and I'm certainly ain't no healer. I can't heal him and wake him up. He'll never wake up again. He's sleeping forever in this world.

For the next couple of days, all I can say was I have definitely no idea what was I doing. I don't know whether to laugh or cry or just be normal. I can never be normal at that time.
For a person who have never face death of a family member, it was hard for me. I don't know what to do at all. I can only cry when I'm alone, not in front of people who come and "visit" grandpa for the last time. I hide my emotions very well. The only thing I can do was talk to was my phone. Text messages, phone calls came non-stop. All of them trying very hard to cheer me up. It worked, for the moment. But after I went to bed and woke up, I felt a sense of emptiness. For the week, I cried everytime I woke up. It was the lowest point of my life and I wish no one will ever see me that way.

After the funeral, everything was back to normal. I'm not quite there yet. But I'm trying very hard. Every morning I say a little prayer for him to lead him to a better life in the after life.
My grandpa was a tough guy. He'll get throught it. I believe he can.

Grandpa, you will always be remembered deep down in our hearts. As your saying goes by, 爱拼才会赢。I will fight till the last day of my life to achieve goals in my life. I'll be a successful achiever for you and the family. I will make you the proudest grandpa on earth and in the after life.

In the remembrance of,
郑水土老先生
(1928-2011)

Bonjour!

2011-08-07T16:29:00.002+08:00

Hello everyone!
I've been busy. So busy I rarely update my blog.
Guess what. One month till my birthday!

First post of 2011.
I've been great if you asked.
Curently, Still single.
My celebrity crush is still the hot TAYLOR LAUTNER.
Nothing much has change.
Just me.
I guess I've grown up more than I think I have.
I've been forced to grow up in this situation.
Thanks though.

One month left till trial. I've been pushing myself everyday, hoping I have enough credits for my college application. I'm gonna work towards my goal! Believe in me casue I believe in myself.
OH! I've deactivated my facebook if all of you wonder where have I been.
I'll be on twitter. Don't worry. I'm still social activate.
http://twitter.com/#!/JunyiTehLautner
That's my twitter link!=D

My 17th birthday bash will be held on the 24th of September 2011. I'm combining with my sister's birthday bash.
Wait for the invitations guys!=D

All right. Time to go.
Till The next time I update my blog.

Ah the Holidays!

2010-12-21T15:34:00.003+08:00

Holidays.
It's all about secrets wasn't it ?
But, I'm done with secrets.
Saying all that's in my mind out loud made me feel myself again.
I hate it with secrets.
For the entire life , I'd been telling people that secrets are save with me and I certainly good at it.
I never really wanted to tell other peoples' secret out to the whole world.
So , this is me telling everybody I don't wanna be good in keeping secrets anymore.
If there's any secrets you wanted me to keep, then save it. You might as well find another person who's good at it(Apart from me).

Put that aside, I had a pretty excited, exhausted, memorable and (of course the word FUN is on it's way) FUN HOLIDAY!=)
It starts of with DONG LIAN CAMP. Like I said on the last post, it ain't that easy dealing with kids. But that doesn't stop me from being a wanna-be-mom-in-10-years-time. LOL.
After that, there's XIA MEN CHINA TRIP with family. I love it despite I can finally spend some time with my WHOLE family. Too bad I was sick for a few days. BTW, china's food is UNBEARABLE! LOL. Did quite a lot of shopping as I always will.=)
Mom always said she's way happier when I was 7 because I wouldn't even step foot in a shopping mall when I was 7. Time seriously has a person changed. Lol.
Then , there was TWK CAMP.I have to be honest i did not really like it because I'm not quite in the camp but to cook. LOL. whatleever.
Next, it was the CAMERON TRIP WITH DONG LIAN. It was awesome! I love it when I'm with them. They don't judge who I am.=). It's just so easy being with them.=)
After that, there was SINGAPORE TRIP with my mom's side family. I must say I was impressed by myself. I have to courage to walk all around singapore now. I must say traveling alone is awesome! Feel like I could walk forever, exploring new thing by myself. What if I did something wrong? That doesn't really matter because there's no one to judge.=)
When I came back, I finally ca hang out with my friends for a days or two. Meet up with JING and EMILIA. Watched an 18PL movie entitiled DUE DATE. For night, went to ST Michael church play with JING,EMILIA,EVA,AH KEI,CARMENN,YYY AND TZQ. It was fun to see all of 'em.=)
Had a small PENANG TRIP with two of my bffs, FEI TAN AND VOON WOOI. I thought it would be quite awkward because there usually won't be only the three of us hanging together and despite everything happened the pass few months, I almost freaked out. But, IT WAS A-W-E-S-O-M-E! Did many things I'd never did before in penang and create some unforgetable memories with 'em. Thank you girls, for creating it with me.=)

There, there's my holidays. Told you it was excited huh.

I'd learn quite a lot throughout the holidays. I guess I'd grown more mature and I learn to handle things more on my way. I'm glad of my changes.=)

Sometimes, things don't go the way you wanted them to be.
By the time, you have to change. Al least for your own sake.

OH ! I'M OBSESSED WITH GOSSIP GIRL!<3

XOXO,
JTL

Brand new one.

2010-11-29T00:16:00.001+08:00

Still, I'm afraid of loneliness. After dong lian's children camp, feelings of loneliness rush into my mind in no time. It's like they missed me so much and they wanna owe me immediately. I don't like it. Seriously, every time when I try to ignore something, it came haunting me.

Put that issue apart, I actually had a lot of fun during the camp. It was not easy. I admit I did screw up a lot. Still, nobody's perfect. I learned a lot throughout this camp. Sifu is the one that should be thank. Thank you , sifu. Your teaching really did help me in life. I'll always remember that.
As for my friends who'd together make this camp a success, thank you too. Words can't express how thankful I am.

Sometimes, I try hard to blend in. When I do that, it ain't me. I don't wanna be somebody I'm not. But when I don't, people would not wanna be close to me. Quite tiring you know. I just wanna be the only me. I wish people notice the real me is way better than the girl wearing a fake mask. I wish to take it of forever. Not wearing it makes me feel extremely comfortable. Only if people would ever notice.

Xoxo
JTL

Words that'll never be told.

2010-11-21T00:03:00.003+08:00

Aching.
Didn't realize it hurt so badly until today.
For all this months, today I finally feel the pain and the emptiness in my heart.

Never thought it would be both of you.
Never thought me for not telling you I had feelings for him made myself hurt.
Never thought I would care that much.
Until my sister told me this:"You spent the whole night talking about the guy once like you and you turned him down after that only you realize the feelings for him is real. So, what does that mean? You like him?"
My answer to her is:"If time turned back, I would do the same to him and I would still fall for fake TL. But, I would make things right between us. I know that might be too late by then but I would still like to try."
I was just being stupid, naive and unrealistic.

I was a very simple girl, trying to live my life.
All of the sudden, the world is full of darkness and lies.
It changed me into an insecure girl.
I used to be simple, not anymore.
This world is full with lies. Lies that'd made me insecure.

Hope that one day you would realize that she's not the one for you.
I know I am not the one too.
I just happened to still have those feelings for you for almost a year.
I will and must move on from you.
Cowardly is not my biggest fear.

xoxojtl=)

19/11/2010

2010-11-19T21:48:00.002+08:00

What a meaningful day.
Most of you will probably ask me why is this day so meaningful.
I would probably say it's the start of something new and the end of something old.
Oh! And, 10 months till my 17th birthday! Lol.(Yea I still do that)

It's the last day of school. Which equals to the end of form4 life.
I had tons of fun today! We only had two periods of chemistry and after that it's gossip hour for the rest of the day.
Awesome!
I had tons of fun gossiping and playing games. I enjoyed it. Thank you for making my last day of form4 honeymoon year a memorable one.

Honesty, I miss my form4 life more than I can tell.
Everything seems to pass by so quickly.
I miss everything I'd ever had during my form4 life. Good or bad, cheerful or sadness, loving or hatred...
I love all of it.
I miss my homestay @ Tokyo, I miss everytime we fight(it means that we still care each other), I miss us going to KL to celebrate meiais birthday, I miss 4s8 moments(all of it!), I miss my sweet sixteen party!(I never said this before but THANK YOU for making it all happen, my parents, my beloved sister and the 9 of you<3), I miss everything that'd happened this year. :)
How I wish I could relive 2010.

While every of this ends, I'm gonna start a brand new chapter of my life.
I bet it's gonna be extremely tough, but I'll get through every obstacles I'm gonna have and enjoy every single moment of my life while I still have one.
I believe someday, I will concure my own world just like what I thought it would be like.

Every bad memories should be forgotten and every sweet ones should be kept in your heart.
That's what I'm gonna do.:)

Xoxo
JTL:)

Confession of a broken heart.

2010-11-17T00:39:00.003+08:00

When I first heard this song, my first impression is this lil girl would be in trouble because there's no love from her family.
Turns out I was right. LILO was a mess for a few years. Now of course everything turns out find for her. I'm glad she made it thru.

Back to the topic of the day. He said if you'd be ready for a relationship, none of this would happen. For me, everything happened for a reason. Maybe this time, god told me to really move on from him. It's been way too long. What can you do? Pour out your heart in this lil blog that you thought nobody would read? Time to move on from him because he already did so. I feel like crying when I heard that piece of news. But what can I do? He's happy and there's nothing else I could do about it. I never really did loved him as a lover. Just friends.
When will you realize that I did have feelings for you for almost a year? I'm always trying to have something special for a person. But, there really isn't anything special from them. You probably won't ever know. Never mind. Time to move on. Good bye forever.

Oh,btw. Thank you, for showing the real side of you to me. You're never gonna change. Maybe in front of me but there's nothing you could do that'll change my mind.

Ciao peeps.
Xoxo
JTL:)

Pass few weeks.

2010-09-30T21:14:00.002+08:00

Lots of stuff happened for the pass few weeks. Some friendships were build and some were torn apart. Some happiness did happen. So does some unhappy ones. Well, that's what life is all about right? The most important thing is to be persevere and concure/solve all the problems you'll be facing. That's what I'm doing. Or at least I'm trying to.
Let's see. Hmm. I kena boycott. Well, it's not really a big deal for me. Although I felt rather unbearable. Some will say, why you kena boycott and not others? Guess everybody has their first? Lol. Well, everybody has their chances. At least I know I still have her. She's always the one who share and solve problems with and for me. Ily!<3
Maybe give all of us a break. I think that's the best. And we'll find one fine day and talk about our problems. I guess That's the best solution. I'm not mad at y'all you know for what you all are doing. 偶尔会辛酸，但我对你们依然有信心。
Next, camera oh camera. The culprit, I don't hate you for making me suffer. You'd made me grown up on my 16th birtfhday. I'll get it back. And We'll do that in private. Nobody has to know.:)
Grandpa, time to take care of your body. Mum's worrying sick right now. Don't make her worry so much. Go and do the operation and after that, I'll make sure you stay health. I'll make sure you get to see your great grandson.
Lol. I never realize some people would still view this deadly dead blog. Anyway, thanks.
Ohh. Dancing. I'm gonna take inter and grade8 next year. I wanna pass all of 'em!:). I'm quite ambitious aren't I? Lol.
Well, have an essay to write. Bye pals.

It came back!

2010-09-09T10:02:00.003+08:00

For months I've been living in my own life, lying to myself that I don't like you but deep down in my heart I do. I never really be truthful with you and myself. You've moved on. So do I.
I've never had this crush feelings for months and finally I do now. He's cute and funny . Maybe he's not that good looking but he's definitely caught my attention. Maybe there's nothing much or him now , I hope I will be. Because it's much more better than pretending. I'm done pretending.
Conclusion, he's so cute!

Friends

2010-09-07T00:18:00.002+08:00

I probably write about this for a zillion times. I don't mind to write it all over again. This time with different comments or opinion.
Well, I'm not afraid of writing anything offensive here cause nobody's gonna notice my blog anymore. That's a pretty good thing.:)
For the record , sabotaging people is already a bad thing to do. She is your best friend. The one whom you tell her your family problems. The one who sits beside you for the whole year. The one whom I think you rely the most on. And now, for some stupid and unreasonable reason, you hate her for that. Sabotaging people is so damn rude. I don't like it at all. I don't like how you act. You need to clean up your act honey. I can't help you if you don't even wanna help yourself. Stop being such an emo freak. Everyone has their own problem. Try to solve it first before you acting like the world's gonna end soon . Get that? I hope you'll apologize . She's sick for god sake .

It's not that easy.

2010-09-05T09:53:00.002+08:00

When you and him were standing in front of me, I panic. My mind went entirely blank. I just follow behind the two of you. And you and him went apart. I decided to follow him and not you because I'm going to the same way he was going. I'm so scare and when my friend saw me and called my name. I quickly hugged her. Nobody know the real reason except myself. It's not that easy you know. I'm trying.
During the BBQ party, we were all talking. Suddenly they talked about fake TL's gf and fake TL. She thought I'm still into him. No way. Him, is so 2009. Maybe he's not right for me but her. Nah.
Journal oh journal. Please keep my lil secret. Until I'm over you.
Xoxo

Thinking

2010-08-29T22:27:00.002+08:00

I've done quite a lot of thinking since I realize he's into her and not me anymore. Lol. Life's alwas full of surprises huh. Well, I kinda get that right now.
So , let's talk about how to get over a person. Hmm... For me, I always do things I love like shopping, eating, watch a god damn good movie... Well, things that I love. It makes me forget all the bad stuff and makes me feel good about myself. I did the same thing during the weekend. I went for two movies(step up3D which was totally awesome and breath taking and vampire suck which totally boring and suck. But I'll give it a 7 since my Liam from 90210 is the male leading of the film) @ mid valley and shopped till my mum dropped(I got my birthday party dress!) and eat of course. Shopping with my sister is not entirely a good thing because she rarely gives comment on what looks good on me and what doesn't. But, she did a pretty good job by picking my birthday party dress. Thanks honey bitch, you know I hate you. Lol. Practically, I had a pretty great weekend. And I realize that I have to o on diet like asap. If not, I'm not gonna look good on the 18th. Three weeks of diet starts now! Wish me luck!
Lol. Since when do I talk everything I feel on my blog? Since I notice nobody reads my blog anymore! Woots!

Letting go.

2010-08-28T09:15:00.002+08:00

Was on the phone with my bbf. He made me realize one thing. It's okay to let go of the past. The past, well , who cares about the past. Who cares if you make mistake that could not be taken back. Rihanna said it's okay to make mistakes. Just promise it won't happen the second time. I get that now.
Everyday people hope to never did this and that. But how many people really think about their mistakes ? All they know how to do is keep saying what if this why if that. If you sit down and think about it, you'll soon see the whole image clearly. I'm nothing but an ordinary girl who wants to live in my ordinary life. Life's already short. For the person who do not dare to let go of the past, life's way too short for you. Move forward. It's better this way.
JTL<3

2010-08-27T23:34:00.002+08:00

He said it was just my instinct. He is your best friend, the person who hangs out with you every single day in life. I ain't him. Seiously, if you like her, just say so when I ask you. Why don't you just say so? I finally wanted to admit my feelings to you but you probably don't give a damn right? I never dd that before in my life. You're the first person, probably not the last person(gonna keep my options open). From now on, I'm gonna keep distance with you. He is better. At least he's truthful. I don't even know how to communicate with you. So, this is the last time I'm gonna blog about you. Talk about blog. You deleted everything about me in your blog. Those post once made me into tears and made some of it sweet. But not anymore. Just shush and don't ever give hopes to me. I've made a mistake that cannot be taken back. Sorry but you're so 2009. Buh-bye.
On your way outta my heart. Turn left please !

外面的世界，很吵很乱。

2010-08-23T23:48:00.002+08:00

I know. I'm a person who do not like to be alone. Love to be around with friends or people. I need people to be by my side. But sometimes, it's just too much. There are too much people talking and so few listening. Sometimes when I went on fb, I just wanna escape from the communication world. There are too much people on the planet that upload or post things. It's kinda irritating. But fb is addictive, no doubts on this which makes me wanna know more.
I'd done a lot of thinking. I Just don't wanna express it right now.
It's good to know that no one is using bloggers right now. I don't nee to worry what to write anymore. It just comes out from my hands and brains without even thinking.
I'm tired. Toodles !

Confess to all of you.

2010-08-22T08:34:00.005+08:00

I've been abandoned my blog for a really long time. Sorry bloggies, if you are still Interested in my life.
I've been suffering a lot. Apart of me do not feel secure. I do not like insecurity. It makes me feel lonely and I don't like to feel loneliness at all. Betrayals reappeared. Strong and secure friendship fades. We do not trust each other so much anymore. We started to backstab each other. It just seemed so messed up.
After japan homestay program, I've met tons of friends. Although I know they are no them, I just like to tell my problems to them first. Cause they're living far far away from me. They won't tell my friends here. Or literally. I don't mean to be so depress or emo if that's what you peeps named it. I was just trying to express everything out.

The next thing, it's you.
You. We Started of just friends. Two months later, you told me you liked me and I was like okay. I said I have rules. Plus I don't have special feelings for you at that time. You've confess to me a couple of times and I turned you down. You said you would wait. I do not believe you. I've lose faith in relationship. I've literally been hurt so badly when I put 100% of my feelings to a guy. He just doesn't seem to give a damn. I got hurt pretty bad. But you didn't care and all you did was to be by my side , hoping I would get out of my fear. I started to have feelings for you. I didn't dare to tell. Afraid that if I told you, everything changes. I try to avoid you after that, ignore your messages, hoping that feelings for you is just a temporally thing. I started to be real close with other guys. And you seemed fed up. After our exam Of the year, I hung out with my friends. And I saw you hanging out with a bunch of girls. My heart ached so badly. Nobody knew. I kept it all by myself. After that, I had a huge fight with you and both of us didn't give a freaking damn to think about what had happen. You talked to me after that and I confessed with you. I said I like you and I remembered that you didn't say it back. And I kinda give up. But when you said back to me, I felt so happy. It didn't last long. I don't think you really meant it but I didn't tell you.
This guy came along. He looks like Taylor Lautner a lot. Similarities were there. I
was crazy about Taylor at that moment. And with his look, I kinda just like at first sight. I forgot all about you because we weren't getting any better. I started going crazy about this guy for two months. You texted. I ignored. And you got so damn mad finding out that I had been going crazy for another guy. You told everyone that you hate me. I didn't care. Cause I like him. When he announced that he had a girlfriend, it was harsh but it wasn't hard to get over him. When I woke up from my lil on fantasy, I realize I'd done some pretty mean stuff to you. You hated me so much. I tried to apologies and everything, hoping that we will go back to how we used to be. Feelings for you weren't there anymore but I felt extremely guilty. I want everything back to normal. But It's close to impossible. You didn't even bother to bother me. I kept trying. You said you'd forgive me and had moved on. I felt bitterness in my heart. But I don't know what was that.
Everytime I see you getting real close or cozzy with a girl, I got jealous. Everytime you talk about other girls but not me, I felt suffocated. It's almost unbearable when I know that you're getting so well with my best friend. I got really jealous.
Those are the symptoms saying that I still like you.
I like you.
This is the second time I confess to you. You're the first guy that I confessed to and it's still you. I know you probably had move on. But writing this makes me feel better. At least I know you won't read. Lol.
Maybe, I'm the one that should move on. It's been going on for two years.
Maybe. :)
Confession ends.
Xoxo.
Till next time bloggies <3

Have faith in me.

2010-07-17T22:04:00.003+08:00

Okay , I know I've been a party girl since school reopens. I went out every weekends. Function, shows, concerts and all. But I did study too. Well, maybe Not as much as before the holidays. I know where my position is. This year, I have to work extra hard to achieve what results I actually want. I did try taking up a book and read, study or whatever. But functions just won't stop showing. And me, as the kinda active girl and the P word girl needs to attend all kinds of functions. It's been one month for me to socialize with all sorts of people. It just gets kinda addictive. But I'm controlling myself. I promise I'm gonna study, work hard to get what I wanted. Starts from tomorrow. One month till monthly test. You just have to believe in me. Let me fall once so I fell the pain and I'll make sure I don't fall down again. That's what life is. You have to fail once or twice to learn, else you'll never learn. I'm still the same old girl that study and party at the same time. That's just who I am. Have faith in me.

Responding .

2010-07-03T07:39:00.002+08:00

So here's my reply . Since this year , you close your heart , yourself to all of us . It's true . We hardly talk to each other anymore . You could find me and all . But nevermind . Put that aside . You said my facebook or blog don't have your name ? Think twice . I did post about you . Just look t the last two previous post .
You know why I treated Jing as my very best friend ? It's because we have so much in common . We're always there for each other . We know each other's feeling very well . That's why we connected to easily .
And I don't know why we are arguing because of yyy's case and all . Those are their problems not yours and not mine . Our problems is you ain't talking to me at all after I open up to you . I really want us to be like we used to . You just have to open up to me . I'm being very patient already . You know better than anyone else how hot tempered I am . Things could get very ugly if I exploded .
Stop caring what people will think about you . Just be yourself . It ain't that hard . Put all the past tense behind and look forward . If you make a mistake , learn from it and later thank it for forcing you to grow up . If you feel that people hate you , ask her right into her face , not guessing this and that . You'll suffered by your one side thinking . Although I'm damn mad at you , I'm still waiting for the day we talk again .

Japan homestay programme .

2010-06-20T12:29:00.003+08:00

I was told to write a report about the japan homestay programme . Guess I better start now . Write the report here so I can just copy and paste into my folio .
Day 1
I reached at Concorde hotel at 2.00pm . Knowing that we have a coarse to take , me and mei ai went to have lunch at the cafeteria first . At 3.30pm , the coarse started . Sensei briefed us and our parents about the homestay programme . After breifing , I got more into details how the whole programme works . So I felt more relief . After the coarse , we said out goodbyes to our parents and the programme was officially started . Sensei carried out the ice breaking activities . Guess all of us are still shy so we did not really talk much about ourselves . After that , we had our rest and our dinner . At night , we had more activities . We'd been separated into two groups . Tokyo and Nagoya group . We went into our respective groups . Nabil and fadzly sensei was guiding us for the whole trip . Suhana and fadzil sensei was with us too . From the Tokyo group , we've been divided into four groups . Nabil sensei gave us an assignment . We have to use 5 items from the items he gave us to survive on an island . It was indeed very fun . After we'd done our presentation , supper was provided . After that , nabil sensei played a game with us . He ordered us to arrange the chairs so that a T shape was formed . Then he called us to sit on the chairs according our groups . He started to give out instruction . We have to move our respective groups to the opposite side . Plus , we could only overtake different group people . Then the game started . It took us 1 hour to finish the game . And only one person could solve it . That person is none other than me . Yes . I'm the one who solved the game . Finally , all of us could go to bed . Then , lights off at 12am .
Day 2
Morning call at 6.30am . It's a bit too early for us despite some of us slept on the wee hour . After me and yi jing tidy up ourselves , we went to breakfast with mei ai and wan chen . We did not eat much because it's too early for us to eat . So , after breakfast , we're just wandering around the hotel . At 8am , we went into the hall and nabil sensei gave us a long coarse about japan . He practically throw everything he knew about japan to us . So , I'd learnt a lot about japan by the middle of the day . After we had our lunch , we packed our luggage and prepare to head to KLIA . By 4pm , we had all checked in and waiting for our airplane. We had a lot of free and easy time since our flight was at 8.30pm . At 8.30pm , we said our goodbyes to our beloved country . We landed at changi airport at 9.30pm . It was just a short flight. And after that , we had a lot easy going time again . Our next flight to Narita was at 11.45pm . We window shopped a while and buy some stuff for our one week stay at japan . By 11.15pm , we boarded onto the plane and then , we had a long and tiring 6 hours flight . I slept and listen to Justin Bieber most of the time . And when I woke up , the next thing I knew was I'm already arrive at japan . Here I come japan !
Day 3
The weather at japan was cold . Not hot at all . I thought it was summer . Guess I was being cheated then . Still , I love the weather there . Not too hot yet not to cold . A perfect weather for us Malaysian . From Narita , we went to Tokyo hippo family's place . It's a two hour ride . So some of us slept on the bus . We reached there at about 12.00pm . And there my friend , is the first time I met my foster mother , Mori .

Okay , I had practically done my japan homestay report . It's a good thing I wrote everything down while it's still fresh . I'm so proud of myself . Lol . Bloggies , sorry I had not been able to update my blog . I know it's been like 1 month or more . I had been busying with my exam , ballet exam , homestay , camp and whatsoever programme . Now I'm free . I'll try to update more Kay ? Sincerely . Sorry . I still love you . :)
xoxo . I know I love you .

Justin Bieber - Never Say Never ft. Jaden Smith

2010-06-01T16:08:00.000+08:00

Coolest thing ever !!!
The reason I wanna watch Karate Kis is mainly because of Taylor Lautner(He's a karate champion~) . Now I have another reason to watch .
Justin B. !!! And the oh-so-cute Jad Smith !
Karate Kid , here I come !
*Will update soon but first , enjoy the vid ! <3

Eenie Meenie !!!

2010-05-01T00:20:00.002+08:00

I woke up @ 3.30 am this morning remembering what Xuan had told me . Eenie Meenie video is coming out ! So after I had finished my homework which I did not finish last night due to high fever , I immediately turn on my iphone and search for it . And I found it . But , what the heck ,VEVO has been blocked by malaysia . So I went to Xuan's profile and found it again . Of course , she kept showing off she'd downloaded it . Lol . And I clicked on twitvid . Oh My ! It took ages to load that video on iphone . So , I gave up and went to bed for 10 minutes . Then my mum knocked my door and told me it's time for school . I was like "so fast ?" . I still felt sick and have second thoughts about going to school . But I don't even dare to miss a single period of lesson . Those lessons are precious (for us who are having mid year term soon) , still a tinee tiny boring . So , went to school , tuition and everything . Got home by 8pm . Proud of myself . Then watched the opening ceremony of EXPO with daddy . It was an epic ! woah ! And so I did my add maths homework and whatsoever . Skip ! And now , I'm watching EENIE MEENIE like NON STOP . I kept on pressing the replay button . Awww ~ seriously , I'm in love . No , it ain't star struck . I'm in love ! with JUSTIN DREW BIEBER !<3

Oh yea ! Remember I'd post a latest single by sean and justin . well , it's SHAWTY LET'S GO . It was magnificient . =)

Btw , the girl starring in Justin Bieber's BABY video ? She actually sings . And I think she's beautiful . Take a look . It's SERIOUS by Jasmine V. !=)

Okay ! That's the end . Till next time . xoxo . <3

=D

2010-04-28T21:39:00.003+08:00

Yay ~ I had gone to the stage where I no longer a text-er but a facebooker . It's a good thing right ? I received less than 30 messages per week . That's less than a quaternary compared to two years back then when I used to receive more than 100 messages per day . Scary right ? Facebook is much more fun . Somemore I have my Taylor and Justin on net to admire . Lol . Btw , everybody is calling me Junyi Lautner . Aww . Cambry even called me Lautner . It's like I belong to him . Hahaha . Just , nevermind . And Justin ! Please please please . Like the group Justin bieber Malaysia on fb . He HAS to come to Malaysia . Let's like the group and make Justin come here to sing for us . I ain't gonna wait for too long . Come now !=D

Singapore trip .

2010-04-19T07:43:00.005+08:00

It all start off on Saturday when I got up of bed as early as I possibly can which was 8am . I tried my best to finish my homework as fast as possible before 11am so I can catch up with the movie entitled clash of the titans on time . But homework are unbelievably hard ! I have no choice but to cancle my plan and all . Felt so sorry for my sister cause she look forward to watch the movie too since Sam worington is starring . Alas , I finished all my homework at exactly 1pm . Believe it or not , I actually felt proud of myself . =E . After that , I went to have a bath . At 2pm , we(me and my sister) went to parade to have our lunch @ mp . Approximate 3.45pm , off we go to the airport . After we checked in , we waited for our flight . Around 4.30pm , we boarded to our plane . The flight is not what I've expected . Not the best but I'd survived . We arrived Changi airport at 6.15pm and checked out afterwards . That's it . We boarded our first flight alone , without parents guardian . I'm so proud of myself . =) . Mummy took us to the Robertson Quay Hotel , the hotel we're staying at . We tidy ourselves a bit and we went to The Red House to have our dinner . We had a lot of food . Had the famous chili crab in town . Aww . I'm definitely in heaven at that moment . After having our dinner , our stomach bloated . We went for a walk along the river and explore the whole Clark quay . There are A lot of things to see . It's indeed a very good experience for me . Bought some stuff and walked the whole night . When we got back to the hotel , it's already 11pm . Both my mum and my sister were exhausted . Not me , not yet . I spent the rest of my night reading Dear John , written by currently my favorite book writer Nicholas Sparks . By 12pm , my daddy came home . I wished him happy birthday and gave him the piece of cake I bought that night . His birthday is over but I'm glad I still be able to wish him face to face . Happy birthday , big daddy !!! I love you , always and forever !<3 . The next day , I got up at some time around 8am . After I clean myself and everything , we went to the Universal Studio . It was beyond fun ! I never regret going there . And bloggies , that place is much bigger and more fun and exciting comparing to Hong Kong Disneyland . No offence but I really did not have much fun two years back then . I can spend the whole day in Universal Studio ! Seriously ! And I'm definitely gonna have a next time there . I just can't get over any of it . You'll totally get a clue of that fasinating place once I upload all the pictures on facebook . Go and have a look pals ! It's worth an eyed . *Too bad I don't have a chance to have a ride at the most breath taking ride of all , due to some technical problem which I secretly cursed it . Other than that , everything was just perfect . Singaporean and Malaysian are good ! Ohh ohh ohh ! I went for wall climbing too . Me and my sister did . I told that guy pulling me up that it's my first climb . And when I start climbing , I just have a voice in my head telling me to get to the top . I though I can't success . When I was half way through , I was already half dead . I told the man I wanted down but he didn't listen to me . Instead he pulled me up a bit so my hand could reach for the support . I did . Finally , I'm at the top already . I was surprised how far have I went . I felt so successful . Although it's my first , I still managed to climb the whole wall . My sister gave up in the end . I felt incredible ! If there's such thing in Malaysia , I'm definitely doing it again . Well , let me tell you , it's not as easy as you've seen on the television . It needs a lot of strength and energy . Be prepared before you're carrying out that activity . Fun but alas , my legs and hands are totally sore . When it's 4.30pm , mama told us we have to get going if not we're going to miss our only transport back to the hotel . As unwilling as we want , we have to wave good-bye to so far our favorite fun park . The minute we walk into our room , my sister wants to go cycling at the east coast park . So , off we go again , heading to east coast park . Along the jitney , we had a great communication with the taxi driver . He seems so friendly . We joked a lot and he told us a lot about Singapore . At about 6.00pm , we finally arrived . My sister and I rented two bikes for 2 hours . My mum says you must ride for two hours if not money will be wasted . I did . Along my ride , I saw a lot of things . I knew more about Singapore . The view was beyond great . No doubt I'm in love with the view . I ride along the cycling lane , amazed with the view . I totally forgot about the time . And when I realize my sister is not following behind me , I already rode for an hour . Worrying my sister , I quickly turn back . Finally I found her and noticed that her leg was bleeding . She told me it's going to rain soon and it's time for us to head back to mum and dad . I looked at the grey sky and realize that it's true . So we cycled back with twice the speed we cycled before . It's very tiring but getting wet was the last thing I want . But we can't fight the rain and we have no choice but to wait in a shelter nearby . We were all wet by that time . My sister's toe was unbearable pain and I asked for a piece of tissue from a singaporean . She thought no twice and gave it to us . I'm so touched and I definitely felt warmed . Pssss.... I also saw two foreigner making out at the shelter . Awww ... Sweet ! After 10 minutes , we had a race with the time since we have to return our bikes at 8pm . I rode that bike so fast I don't even know where was I already . Finally , at 7.55pm , I saw my mum . I was gonna cry but I didn't . I felt that i've completed a task . It felt so satisfied . You can't describe the feeling. It's just so special . If anyone ask me did I regret , the answer is no ! My dad of course was angry at us . I did not speak . But after all , he's just worried about our safety that's all . Both of us was shaking like mad . So we went to 7 eleven to buy something hot to drink anc plaster for my sister's toe . Singapore's 7 eleven was the best 7 eleven i've ever been into for my whole life , so far . They sell even soft toys there ! Lots of chips ! Owhh ! I can spend the whole day in 7 eleven without complaining . And so , we bought our cappucino mocha . I felt so warm . Then , we waited for taxi and went back to the hotel . We bath and rest for a while . At 9pm , we went for dinner . The way to the restaurant is incredibly far . We walked for like 20 mins . Pssss... I saw another foreigner couple make out on the street again . Haha . Finished our dinner at 10pm and went back to the hotel after then . Lights off at 11.30pm . Woke up at 7.30am the next morning and went for breakfast at 9am . We had Korean food ! Yummy ! Then we walk along orchard road and walking in the malls . Nothing special . Tons of branded shops like prada , LV , chanel and so much more . Those bags ate like once touch consider sold . I could only look but not owe . That feeling is just too bad . My dad decided we should experience taking MRL . So we bought the tickets from a talking machine and waited for the MRL . It's at the basement so I felt a tiny bit of discomfort . When the MRL arrived , I saw people rushing in and out as if they are superb busy . I don't know much about their lifestyle but this is how they live , underpressure and fighting for every oppotinity in their life . Finally , mine is here . When the door is opened , my discomforty all wad gone . MRL was like a men feast you know . Tons of guys taking the MRL is so my type . I just wanna "eat" all of them . MRL ? Definitely have a second time . Too bad we have to stop at city hall . Nevermind . Wait for the next time . So , we shop around the city hall . There's a lot of mall since all of the malls linked together . I walked pass a music store named HMT and I immediately spotted a New Moon DVD with freebies ! I asked for my parents permission . They nodded and I bought it ! Argh ! I'm so thrilled at that time . And ! I bought Justin Bieber My World 2.0 ! That day went from boring to smiling ! I went to their MPH too . Bought The Last Song written by of course the unbearable Nicholas Sparks . I'm so so so happy . By 11.00am , we went to have our lunch and went back to the hotel for checking out and straight away headed to the airport . And that's me , writting this post at Changi airport . Well , I have written down all my journey in Singapore . I had a blast . I hope y'all bloggies had fun reading my post and feel the excitement I felt too . That's all for now . Till next time . Tata !

随缘...

2010-04-02T10:43:00.000+08:00

越多事情你越想得到它，反而往往会远离你，正所谓凡事不要太过强求

　　在这个世界上，凡事不可能一帆风顺，事事如意，总会有烦恼和忧愁。当不顺心的事时常萦绕着我们的时候，我们该如何面对呢?“随缘自适，烦恼即去”。其实，随缘是一种进取，是智者的行为，愚者的借口。何为随?随不是跟随，是顺其自然，不怨恨，不躁进，不过度，不强求；随不是随便，是把握机缘，不悲观，不刻板，不慌乱，不忘形；随是一种达观，是一种洒脱，是一份人生的成熟，一份人情的练达。

　　何为缘?世间万事万物皆有相遇、相随、相乐的可能性。有可能即有缘，无可能即无缘。缘，无处不有，无时不在。你、我、他都在缘的网络之中。常言说，“有缘千里来相会，无缘对面不相识”。万里之外，异国他乡，陌生人对你哪怕是相视一笑，这便是缘。也有的虽心仪已久，却相会无期。缘，有聚有散，有始有终。有人悲叹：“天下没有不散的筵席。既然要散，又何必聚?”缘是一种存在，是一个过程。

　　“有缘即住无缘去，一任清风送白云。”人生有所求，求而得之，我之所喜；求而不得，我亦无忧。若如此，人生哪里还会有什么烦恼可言?苦乐随缘，得失随缘，以“人世”的态度去耕耘，以“出世”的态度去收获，这就是随缘人生的最高境界。

　　“随缘”，常常被一些人理解为不需要有所作为，听天由命，由此也成为逃避问题和困难的理由。殊不知，随缘不是放弃追求，而是让人以豁达的心态去面对生活；随缘是一种智慧，可以让人在狂热的环境中，依然拥有恬静的心态，冷静的头脑；随缘是一种修养，是饱经人世的沧桑，是阅尽人情的经验，是透支人生的顿悟。随缘不是没有原则、没有立场，更不是随便马虎。“缘”需要很多条件才能成立，若能随顺因缘而不违背真理，这才叫“随缘”。

　　生活中，常有人会有这样的感慨和迷惑：“为什么有的人不喜欢我?”“为什么有的人不理解我?”“为什么会是这样?”若从随缘的角度看，不喜欢不需要任何理由，喜欢也不需要任何理由；理解不需要任何理由，不理解也不需要任何理由。缘分就是缘分，不需要任何理由。

　　随缘是一种平和的生存态度，也是一种生存的禅境。“宠辱不惊，闲看庭前花开花落；去留无意，漫随天外云卷云舒。”放得下宠辱，那便是安详自在。吃饭时吃饭，睡觉时睡觉。凡事不妄求于前，不追念于后，从容平淡，自然达观，随心，随情，随理，便识得有事随缘皆有禅味。在这繁忙的名利场中，若能常得片刻清闲，放松身心，静心体悟，日久功深，你便会识得自己放下诸缘后的本来面目：活泼泼的，清静无染的菩提觉性。人们获得缘不是靠奋斗和创造，而是用本能的智慧去领悟去判断。

　　佛家多讲随缘，有“随缘不变，不变随缘”、“随缘，莫攀缘”等说法。“随缘”不是随便行事、因循苟且，而是随顺当前环境因缘，从善如流；“不变”不是墨守成规、冥顽不化，而是要择善固守。随缘不变，则是不模糊立场，不丧失原则。就在世间上做人，要通情达理、圆融做事，这样才能够达到事理相融。

　　随缘不变，则是不违背真理。庄子妻死，他知道生死如春夏秋冬四季的变化运行，既不能改变，也不可抗拒，所以他能“顺天安命，鼓盆而歌”；陆贾《新语》云：“不违天时，不夺物性。”明白宇宙人生都是因缘和合，缘聚则成，缘灭则散，才能在迁流变化的无常中，安身立命，随遇而安。生活中，如果能在原则下恪守不变，在小细节处随缘行道，自然能随心自在而不失正道。

　　随缘，是一种胸怀，是一种成熟，是对自我内心的一种自信和把握。读懂随缘的人，总能在风云变幻、艰难坎坷的生活中，收放自如、游刃有余；总能在逆境中，找寻到前行的方向，保持坦然愉快的心情。随缘，是对现实正确、清醒的认识，是对人生彻悟之后的精神自由，是“聚散离合本是缘”的达观，“得即高歌失即休”的超然，更是“一蓑烟雨任平生”的从容。拥有一份随缘之心，你就会发现，天空中无论是阴云密布，还是阳光灿烂；生活的道路上无论是坎坷还是畅达，心中总是会拥有一份平静和恬淡。

Writing stuff .

2010-03-27T18:04:00.002+08:00

I just realize I did not write a single blog in this month at all .
Just keep on posting videos and new songs .
Wanted to write about everything that had happened in this month but I don't know how to actually write them in words .
It's too hard for me .
But I wanted to finally write about them .
Cause it's kinda hard to keep them in my mind , by myself .

Beginning of the month , I was just preparing for my monthly test and stuff .
The second week , I had my test . Not very well thought . My ADD MATHS , I can't even finish those questions . Guess I have to train myself more .

Then the holidays began .
The first day of the holiday , I received a phone call from Evelyn telling me that her father had passed away an hour ago . I'm like stunned after hearing that . Then I confirmed with her and she said it's true .I bursted into tears immediately . I can't believe it . He used to be so healthy every time I saw him and wishing me the best in my studies and suddenly he had a heart attack and he's gone just like that . I can't can't can't accept that all of the sudden . But , I know one thing immediately . I have to be there for my friend . Felt guilty for not being there for her all this long . I'm sorry , Evelyn Tng Yew Lan . And believe me , your dad will be in heaven very soon . =)Just keep holding on and I'll be there for you .
After that , holidays doesn't feel like holiday anymore . I did not have some real fun except the first sunday of the holiday when I could meet up my bro . =) He'd became more mature and man in a good way . I love the new him so much . He knows that already . I realize it's very tough to study in Uni . It's very very hard . Well , all the best to you big bro . =)Love you . <3

When school reopen , my test results were announced too . I'm not the bottom something but I'm not the top too . Honestly , there's a lot of competition in 4s8 . And it's hard for me to compete . P7 never competes . Well , p7 did compete with each other but not so obvious . I'm so stressed up . But I think I can survive . I will survive my high school years in s8 . I know I will . =)

Friends .
Idk .
It's really complicated .
I can't read what she's thinking anymore .
We hardly talk this week . No No No . We did not talk at all . She gave me this feeling like she's ignoring me or something . We don't find each other anymore and I don't know why . I tried to find something to talk to her but nothing comes to mind . She's always the one who starts a conversation with me . Kinda sucks tho . I hate when we're not talking . So Lee Voon Wooi , if you're reading , I'd like to talk to you and now how you're doing . I don't like this weird feelings growing in me . It's not my favorite company .
Evelyn Tng , I know you're having a real hard time . But sometimes , you just have to tell me something . You always hide your feelings . You don't let me know . And I really can't understand why did you act so strange again when all of us hung out today . It's like one minute you're fine but the next minute you've become the depress Evelyn I knew before that . I don't want that . I just want you to just spill out everything . Really . Don't hide it from us anymore . We're there to have fun today and when I saw your depress look , I'm not having fun already . If we're there to have fun , just HAVE FUN ! You know I love you and I just want you to just let go of yourself and have fun and just laugh all day if you can . ILY <3
For Emilia , Cheryl ,Meiai , Fei ,Kelly , Everything between us seems okay . And I'm glad we stay as bff until now . Will this last forever ? I really don't know but hopefully it'll last .
There's this two friends that really makes me feel comfortable when I'm around them . Jing and Lala . I don't know . Every time I saw them , my terrible mood instantly turns around . Especially Jing . She just knows me so well . I'm glad to have such great friends around me .I'm glad to have all of you as my friends . Really . Names that I've mention . All of you . =)

Family .
This is the one thing I would not have to worry about .
My family is perfect . I love them . Them love me . We love each other so much . Not a fight had happen in my family for like a year ?
Ohh I love my family so so much . <3 . xoxo .

Something to be happy about . Not really . Justin Bieber's latest album My World 2.0 is in the stores now . Well , not in M'sia yet . =( BOOHOO~

Btw , Life is very precious .

That's all about now . =)
Till next time bloggies . =D

Telephone ~

2010-03-19T15:27:00.001+08:00

Oh my ! This song is Hawt ~ =D

Justin Bieber 's Common Denominator .

2010-03-15T17:13:00.001+08:00

Taylor Lautner @ Oscars !!!

2010-03-12T13:12:00.001+08:00

Eclipse Trailer ! =)

2010-03-12T12:34:00.001+08:00

Oh my Taylor ! He's still the Taylor I LOVE the most . <3

Joe Munoz

2010-02-26T15:03:00.002+08:00

Oh my effin' god !!!
Joe Munoz got kicked out .
Are you blind , america ?
He's like the best of the whole boys group and you just let him go ?
TIM URBAN should go cause his voice really suck !
Omg !!! Urghh~
You'll regret for sending him home , america .
Gosh ~

American Idol Season 9 Top 24 .

2010-02-26T13:24:00.005+08:00

Well , I always fall for every season of American Idol . Season 9 is definitely included .
Joe Muñoz , Aaron Kelly , Lee Dewyze - currently my favorite . They're good and both of them(Joe and Aaron)look kinda alike Archie , physically and voice respectively .
Here are the top 24 contestants .

Justin Bieber's Baby .

2010-02-21T00:15:00.002+08:00

Now this is the song I'll listen to every single day .
He's the coolest . ILYJUSTIN ! <3

If I don't get to fall in love with TL anymore one day , He'll be the top of my list . Seriously . =D

Justin Bieber and Sean Kingston latest hits !

2010-02-21T00:11:00.000+08:00

It's him , going to IMU .

2010-02-20T12:23:00.004+08:00

Today's the day my brother , the one and only Teh Jun Xian , all grown up , going to uni .
I'm like surely gonna miss him cause I already do .
I don't get to see him in months . And that really sucks .
I still remember those days when he came home all the time although he's in college . I just want him to like not come back for a few months . I regret it now .
Well , he's like the coolest brother in the universe .
I miss him hugging the crying me when I was like 6 or 7 years old , him giving me my birthday presents every year , him arguing with me , him fought with me , we gossiping about boys and girls stuff , him fetching me everywhere ...... every
thing about him .
And I felt so bad not going to IMU with him today . I spent my night dining with family and watching Vampire Diaries till midnight . He wanted me to go but I woke up really late and alas , Mummy told me to just stay at home to guard my sister and the house . Sorry Bro . Real sorry .
I just wanna wish you luck in there . Don't ever get kick out . You're always that example for me to follow . I wanted to be better than you all the time . You're always that only one example that I learn from . You'll always be .
Just so you know , no matter what , I'll always love you . <3
P.S : Please find yourself a girlfriend fast . I don't want you to be alone there . =)

iPad

2010-02-19T10:27:00.001+08:00

I want it i want it i want it ~~~ SO BADLY !

Taylor Lautner's everything !

2010-02-11T19:34:00.001+08:00

Taylor Lautner's birthday is today !!! 11/2 . =D
And Valentine's day is up ! Wohoo ~ <3

What a week .

2010-02-05T23:16:00.002+08:00

What a week !
In the beginning of the week , I just got into the biggest argument with Cheryl . Felt bad about it but I won't apologize for sure . Cause I think I did nothing wrong . If she can't accept who I am and how do I react , I guess she just can't accept me , Teh Jun Yi .

And , Qian told me she went to stadium last Sunday and I was like WTF ?! But at last I guess there's nothing wrong going there WITHOUT INFORMING ME . So , just forget about it . Although I seriously wanna go there .

Then , I've heard some really disgusting stuff about a friend of mine . I mean not-my-friend-anymore-friend . He's like the most disgusting person on earth . So , I ended our friendship . Not worth it btw . He's a big fat liar , womanizer and whatsoever . Watch out fella friends .

Besides , Lala's phone dropped at parade and got picked up by someone else who intentionally do not want to return it to her . That means steal ! What's wrong with people this days . Don't they have any moral or whatsoever ? Urgh ~ Wasted my precious time . I'm so frustrated !

Plus , when I told my mum I wanna quit learning piano . She gone really mad . Mummy , I don't like piano . I don't have any interest in it . Not before , Not now , definitely not in the future . So , please just let me stop . I won't be happy anyway .

I really hope , by the end of the week , everything will turn around . Well at least I hope so . =/

Xoxo .

Giving up . =)

2010-01-29T15:53:00.002+08:00

Had my worst weekend ever .
But everything starting to turn around on wednesday . I'm feeling much much more better after I had a chat with her , my friend + senior .
I thought it'll be like so weird chatting with her . But she actually trusted me and like told me everything about it . I felt so guilty for saying so many bad stuff about her , almost hating her . She's like treating me as a friend and I treated her like crap .
From now on , doubting her no more . I'll treat her as my true friend .
*Y'all are a perfect couple . All the best to y'all my friends . =D

I'm starting to blend in with my new classmates . They're like really funny . Misterious too . LOL . New friends like class rap , tsu wei , gee cheng , eva , lau tong , carmen ...... are really fun to hang out with . =D It's like really nice to know y'all . Hope we'll have a great year together . =)

Btw 3p7 , I won't ever forget about you girls . Like I said , still at the top of my list . =D . ILY ! <3

Owh , Ping's house warming picture will be uploaded soon at FB . Be a lil bit more patient about it kay ? =)

It's been 2 months plus and now it's time to give up and letting it go . Thanks for the memories . =)

Yea , I lose .

2010-01-24T00:07:00.001+08:00

Winner takes it all and loser of course is going straight out of the door .

American Idol's back ! =D

2010-01-17T08:24:00.003+08:00

Seriously , Simon Cowell is still my favorite judge .
I can't believe he's leaving after this season .
I mean , first Paula then Simon ?
You're gonna leave Randy all by himself ?
The world loves you Simon .
Just sign another I-don't-know-how-many-season contract please . =(

Btw , Watched the Boston audition .
The free-cancer man's voice really WOW me .
He's really good . =)

This audition in Atlanta is the best audition ever .
Last Wednesday , General Larry Platt sang his song - Pants On The Ground .
Simon's prediction was right . It's already a hit just in a few days .
I'm like laughing non stop every time I saw this video . I even sang with him . LOL .

Enjoy ! =)

A nice saturday to study .

2010-01-16T15:56:00.003+08:00

I don't really remember when was the last time i actually sat at home and study . It'd been quite some years . I'm like really glad I have time for my studies and all . Btw , I'd joined JV . We'll see how long can I stand in that society . =P

'Now here's a bit of advice
Be sure that nice really means nice
Then you'll never be losing at dice
Though you may lose you heart once or twice'

Xoxo .<3

Ending it .

2010-01-10T22:19:00.002+08:00

I'm ending one thing I used to love .
I mean , I'm still in love with it but something had change .
Maybe I'm not ready to accept it so I chose to run away from it .
That's right . I quit AMCCO .
I'm still crazy about it . I'm still gonna watch the competition held in Genting every year .
But , my future's more important than this .
Sorry KHONG HUI HUI , NGEOW PEI HSIN , CAI WING , QI MEI , emilia , evelyn , cheryl , chooi yi , yen fern , yee teng ...Sincerely . =(
I'll still watch this year's concert . =) Promise .

Thanks for those who'd console me when I'm really confuse .=)

Taylor Taylor Taylor <3

2010-01-10T00:49:00.002+08:00

The Taylors SPLIT ?!

OMG ! Over FOOD ?! I don't care .
Taylor Lautner , go get your girl back !

Taylor Lautner Wins Breakout Movie Actor Award At People's Choice Awards 2010 !
Wohoo ~
Thanks to pinkfish , I voted for him ! Like zillion times ? LOL .
For the record , He's still the best !
Aww ~
And I'm still crazy about HIM .<3
*BTW , Please don't click anything written on the video .

PLEASE get back together . =(

4s8 .

2010-01-08T16:10:00.002+08:00

From the title above , Y'all probably should have know what class am I in .
Yea , It's an 8 this time .
It's like the biggest change for the 3p7-ians .
Every single one of us broke down yesterday .
Not really a good day for us .

We've been in the same class for like 3 years .
And that's 36 months , 1095 days , 26280 hours , 1576800 minutes and 94608000 seconds .
That's a lot .
It's hard for us to accept the fact we'll be separated .
After recess yesterday , all of us sat there without a word .
We chose to be quiet(which was really abnormal) .
After the long long wait , teacher came in and told us our classes of this year .
It started with 3p10 and ended with 3p7 .
We broke down the minute the teacher said chang min's name .
Holding each others hands and hoping we'll be in the same class again .
Well , lucky for some of them , they are still in the same class . Not me . I'm not the lucky one . I cried like really really hard . Hoping everything's not real . I can't believe anything . When everything ends , teacher called us to go to our own classes . I was like please , oh please , just let me sit on the floor with all of them for a lil' moment more .

When I went out the hall with the other 8 of my 3p7 ex-classmates , I'm really glad I still have them . Luckily god didn't take them away from me too . If not , I may be diagnosed having heart attack .

Suddenly , this girl jumped out in front of me . I thought she's just gonna comfort me or what . It turns out she's in the same class with me . I was like Really ?! She asked me to sit with her in class and I said yes . I'm really glad she'd asked me to . She's no one but the one and only Voon Tsuping ! <3 Thanks honey . =)

Emilia Yong and Evelyn is in 4s5 . Cheryl Chia's in 4s6 . Mei Ai's in 4s7 . I'm in 4s8 . Lee Voon Wooi , La Pui Shan , Yaw Yi Jing and Tan Ming Fei went to 4s9 . I was kinda relief they're still in the same class cause they'll always remind me of 3p7 . How I wish I had remembered every bit of p7 for the pass three years . The four of you , Please remember me all the time that I still have y'all so I won't feel extremely lonely . I might have some new BFFs in the next two years , but the 10 of you will always be my forever BFFs no matter what . La Pui Shan , I still need to attend your brother's wedding two years later . =) Just so you know , I really love y'all . =)

Loh Jie Qian , I'm so thrilled you've change to 4s8 . We've been classmates since I don't know , 1st grade ? LOL . Fate really brought us together all the way till today . You'll always be my bitch and ILY ! <3

4S1:LOO SHIN HUI,SOW JIA YEE
4S5:CHANG MIN,CHENG JIN YEE,EMILIA YONG,EVELYN TNG
4S6:CHERYL CHIA,CHOY WENG YAN,CHRISTINA PANG,DING ZU HUI
4S7:JANICE TEH,HOW MEI AI,KAN XYUEN ENG,WONG YAN YING,YAP SEE MIN
4S8:LIM ZHI ROU,LOH JIE QIAN,NG CHI KUAN,ONG JO ERN,TAN KAR MUN,TAN WAI YEE,TEH JUNYI,TENG JO EE,VIVIAN WONG
4S9:CHANG WAI LENG,CHOO CHIEN HUI,KWOK YAN YEE,LA PUI SHAN,LEE VOON WOOI,LOH JIA YING,TAN MING FEI,TAN YIE WEN,TUNG SOOK KENG,VOON XI YEE,YAW YI JING
4S10:KOK WENJING
4S11:NGEOW PEI HSIN,TAN EE JIN(Not sure)
4S12:CHEONG SIN LOO
We've all been separated . The one and only 3p7 will only be cooperative when we're together .=)

Now , It's time to move on . Ping made me felt totally comfortable in the class today . You know how much I love you right , Ping ? =D I'll try to know each and every single one of the 4s8-ians now . Hope we'll have a great year together . =)

That's all for today .
Ta-ta .

4/1/10=School's reopening ! =)

2010-01-03T14:23:00.003+08:00

School's reopening like less than 24 hours .
I seriously can't wait for it .
Although I'll be like superbly busy , looks like I don't care at all . =)

Honestly , I'm a bit nervous about school reopening cause I don't know what class will I be in , who'll be my classmates and who'll be my new badge of BFFs(I already had one badge and that's one hell badge that won't ends) . Seriously , SCARE ! But , I think I'll survive .

Well , Fingers cross bloggies cause tomorrow's gonna be hell of a day .
That's it for now .
It's the beginning of the year babe !

Goodbye 2009 , Hello 2010 !

2009-12-31T11:05:00.003+08:00

Seriously , time flies without us noticing .
When I woke up this morning , I was like Omg!It's the last day of '09.
I told myself I have to spend this day meaningfully .
Everything must be perfect till the very last second .

This year has been a crazy , fun and also very , very stressful year .
Loads of things happened .
Oh ! Okay .
I'll post what I've done throughout this year . That would be fun . =)

Let's starts with 3p7 .
Ohh ! This is a good one .
I can sit down the whole day just to talk about this energetic and also restless class .
We've known for a lot of things .
But mostly , people thought we're a very noisy class .
Teachers love us and of course hate us .
Students envy us but in the end , they can't do anything but to praise us .
The truth is , we're the most cooperate class in the whole school(I guess) .
We worked together to get lots of $$ from the school , in the end we can't finish using the money we have and ended up buying presents for all our teacher .
At the beginning of the year , we won the Chinese new year decoration(2nd).
February , we won sahsia and kebersihan for the month .
July , Canteen day . We won almost everything . =) We even got a RM250 Sushi King voucher .
September , we went to enjoy our sushi . That was a memorable day for us but chaos for the sushi king waiters . LOL .
October , We fought our very best for PMR . And , we also won kehadiran . =)
November , We had our class party @ Folie-folie . That was a really good day for us and also our lovely teacher , Miss Yau .
December , 24TH , PMR RESULT WAS ANNOUNCED . Kelly Pang went back to Ipoh for her result . I've got Straight As .=) Everyone had done their very best and I felt so proud for our class because every single student in 3p7 had work their asses off for this exam . =)
And that's all the things The 3p7ians had done throughout the year .
This is the most cooperate , dedicated , lovely , noisy ,funny and also the best class I've ever been into since I was a 4-years-old . I treasure our memories and the things we had that no other people has . Mostly , I love this class . I love 3P7 ! <3

Next , it'll be my family .
Well , that's nothing much to say .
Practically we spent every holiday in my hometown - Penang .
We had our new year celebration at Penang , as usual .
Then , Chinese new year . The most happy time of all year .
Then , we went back to Penang again on June , for school holidays .
My daddy's birthday . (17/4)
My mummy's birthday. (1/8)
MY BIRTHDAY ! The best day ever ! =D . Spent equal time with friends and family . Those who'd gave me a surprise by showing up , Thank you . (Especially Jing!<3)Watched The Ugly Truth . (19/9)
My sister's birthday party at ICCC . (24/9)
My brother's birthday at Folie-folie . Watched Jennifer's body . (7/11)
The year-end holiday , we practically spent it at KL and Penang only . Didn't go anywhere special because as y'all know , parents are too busy pulling people's tooth out . So , Apology accepted , daddy and mummy . =)
Oh ! Going back to Penang at night . New year celebration . I bet it'll be as fun as the previous years . I have to think about my wishes for 2010 first ! =) I'd made all my wishes came true this year . I'm so proud of myself . =)
In a nutshell , I LOVE MY FAMILY SO MUCH ! Words can't tell how much I love them . <3

Last but not least , My gang !
This gang is formed by ME ! of course , La Pui Shan , Yaw Yi Jing , Lee Voon Wooi , Tan Ming Fei , Pang Hui Mun , How Mei Ai , Emilia Yong , Evelyn Tng and of course Cheryl Chia .
We've been together since day one .
We're not very close for the pass two year . There were always small little cold wars happening between us .
But as we grow , we became more mature and the bond between us became stronger and stronger every single day .
I'm glad our gang is not separated till today .
I don't know what will happen next year . We'll not be in the same class . We won't be as good as old times but There's something we always do , Have each others' back when we're in any kinda trouble . I'm glad we'd been a group for this long . I really appreciate everyone of you . Although sometimes , some of us gets very bitchy . =p .
But that's not the point . The point is I've never been so happy with a group of friends that truly care about me . Y'all made me had unforgettable times every time I'm hanging out with y'all . I really felt cared when I'm with you girls . =)
You know I'm always loving y'all no matter what , right ? <3

That's it for this year .
Last post of the year .
Superbly LONG !
=)
Gonna start blogging again on the 2nd . Or the first ? Fingers cross .
Tata 2009 !
You've given me a wonderful and memorable year of all times . <3

Merry Christmas , Bloggies ! <3

2009-12-26T13:30:00.000+08:00

There's something in the melodies
That the Christmas season brings
Joy and laughter in the air
Smiling faces everywhere

Old familiar melodies
Bring back special memories
They remind us
They remind us

Merrily the choirs sound
Spreading Christmas joy around
Filling hearts with cheer
May it last through all the year

Happy Christmas melodies
Bring back faded memories
They remind us
They remind us

Join us and sing
The sounds of heavn an nature ring
With family, rockin round the Christmas tree
Carols of old, of the greatest story ever told

Sing the melodies of Christmas
Sing the melodies of Christmas

Theres something bout the melodies
Of Santa Claus and Christmas trees
Favorite songs by Nat and Bing
Elvis, Josh and Celine

Its a special time of year
Bringing friends and family near
To remind us
Of love and kindness

Joyful messages you may find
Peace and happiness through all mankind
In the melodies, an offering
Of the love that flows from the Heavenly King

Raise your voice
Let us sing
Its the message that these songs can bring
Round the fire, round the tree
Singing carols merrily

Merry Christmas
Merry Christmas

One more melody to sing at Christmas
One more memory of Christmas cheer

Old familiar melodies
Bring back special memories

Filling hearts with Christmas cheer
May it last through all the year

Something in the melodies
That the Christmas season brings

Joy and laughter in the air
Smiling faces everywhere

Happy Christmas melodies
Bring back faded memorïes

Couple of hours from now .

2009-12-23T18:54:00.004+08:00

Couple of hours till tomorrow .
Tons of things will happen .
Am a lil bit excited yet scared about everything that's gonna happen tomorrow .

Okay Fine .
I'M FREAKING OUT NOW !
PMR results will be announced tomorrow , the christmas - eve - tomorrow .
Anyway , I'm gonna try my 120% to cool myself down .
Had a rough night with my family .
To them , I'm sincerely sorry about everything .
I humiliated my sister at the mall and shouted at my parents today .
It's the tension shouting , not 100% me .
I'll make y'all a deal .
If I get 8As' tomorrow , Shout at me all y'all want for the whole day .
Giving y'all permissions . =)
That's for thanking y'all for being so patient with me for the night . =)

Not sleepy yet .
Gonna watch Grey's to release stress .
(Watching Grey's makes me wanna become a surgeon . I have two options now . A)Dentist and B)Surgeon)
Maybe not .
We'll see .
I'll do anything to let myself loosen up .
It'll be a long , long night .
Psss . Going to Penang with 4 of my besties . Looking forward to it . =)

Anyway , Hopefully I'll get straight As tomorrow .
Fingers Cross , bloggies . =)

You know I'm always loving you . <3

19th of December 2009 .

2009-12-19T15:06:00.002+08:00

Today is the 19th .
It means 10 more month to go till my next birthday .
I always love birthdays , Especially mine .
I'm gonna be 16 after 10 months .
Can't wait !
Especially I'm throwing a big party for my sweet 16 . <3

Okay , I'm obviously just typing craps .
I'm absolutely positively sure I'm freaking bored in my mom's clinic .
I'm sitting at the counter doing registration and stuff .
But I don't think I've done anything so far .
Just open the door for patients .
They just don't give me do anything do they ?
I'm not the small girl you've seen running around the clinic like it's a playground 10 years ago .
I've grown up .
Nobody understands that .

Well , don't let them spoil my mood .
I'm gonna receive my CB jacket today !
Thanks to Qian I've got it , finally . =)
And she bought 100yen icecream for me .
Awww . That's so sweet of her .
At least half an hour later I will have a warm jacket to warm me up . =)

I LOVE CITY BALLET SO EFFIN' MUCH I JUST CAN'T WAIT TO GO BACK . <3

Queen of no marriage .

2009-12-19T02:25:00.004+08:00

Just finish watching Taiwan drama series - Queen of no marriage .
Realize I don't like childish boys but mature ones .
He's the mature one and you're the childish one . I like him , cause he's everything I've ever wished for and I like you because you used your heart to really like me , before ? Idk .
But , I like mature guys .
After I've finished this drama , no doubt I'm sure about it .
I really like mature guys and that's you , S . =)

A Random Thurday .

2009-12-17T10:57:00.004+08:00

So boring right now .
As usual , I sat down on the couch and watched drama series for the whole morning .
Waiting for my Bro to wake up so MAYBE(I said maybe) he'll take me outta this house.
For the record , I starved myself for the whole day yesterday . =D

Taylor Lautner on Saturday Night Live - Opening Skit

2009-12-17T10:42:00.000+08:00

Emilia's party .<3

2009-12-16T20:52:00.014+08:00

Went to Emilia's place for her sweet 15 birthday party .
It was so fun !
Can't stop laughing and of course , eating(which makes me have to starve myself for the whole day . =( . I miss food that is solid .)
I really love the time when all of us are gathered together and just crapping around .
They are always cracking tons of jokes , which obviously , always makes me laugh .
For the record , I LOVE MY GANG TO THE LIMIT ! <3

As I always say , Pictures tell everything . =)

TL's interview . <3

2009-12-14T23:44:00.001+08:00

A perfect Sunday .

2009-12-13T21:30:00.013+08:00

I've been traveling here and there within 24 hours .
How cool is that .
For the past 24 hours , I went to penang to meet up Kelly P and come back . Whoot ~
Fun though . =)
I had the greatest Sunday of the year , today .
Finally , I could sit down and eat lunch with my parents , at home . =D
Now , this is what I do for the rest of the day .
Let the pictures do the talking kay ?
P.S/ The picture of the sun , DON'T LOOK AT THE PICTURE FOR TOO LONG . It's gonna hurt your eyes . No kidding . And AWW , How much I love this picture . It's so bright and sunny ! <3

Finishing Breaking Dawn . =D
Jake , ILY ! <3

Plans .

2009-12-11T23:09:00.003+08:00

Seriously , my mind is full with plans now .
Planning to make emilia's birthday party a success , planning to have a christmas bbq party @ the beach , and of course planning to gather every 3p7 student together for the very last time .
Hope everything works out according to plan .

Nothing much to blog about .
I think tomorrow's gonna be an interesting day . There'll be tons of drama for me to enjoy . Lol .

Please please please text me . =)

Eclipse ! <3

2009-12-10T23:05:00.002+08:00

OMFG !
I don't know how PINKFISH got it .
I mean , she's just the coolest person on earth I've ever met !
It's an honor to be your friend , my lovely twilight-fan-friend . =)
I got THE ECLIPSE poster from her blog .
I was like HOW DID YOU GET THAT when I read her blog !
AWWW . ILY ! <3
So , This is it !
I'm announcing this !
The Twilight saga : Eclipse will be showing on next summer . Be specifically , it's on the 30th of JUNE 2010 !
It's a must-watch !
And I bet all the twilight fans will be saying " TWO THUMBS UP ! " after they watch it .
I'm so watching it more than 5 times ! =)
Pinkfish , you're watching with me ! I had officially booked you on the 30th of June 2010 !
And whoever wished to watch eclipse with the screamer , please say so okay . =)

2012 .

2009-12-09T23:00:00.003+08:00

Finally , I got to watch 2012 . YESTERDAY .
Apparently , I bought the tickets 5 days ago . =D
I know I know . Y'all probably will be saying Omg ! It was like so November . Lol .
I suck at getting sold-out-movie tickets .
Anyway , It's a MUST-WATCH !
=)

What the Fuck !

2009-12-09T01:09:00.006+08:00

Yea right .
I'm dropping the biggest F bomb ever !
I'm not in a good mood right now .
Like I have to tell .
Everything was like what , SHIT ?
No , worst than shit .

First , I went to a camp which I used to love . Past tense .
Full of bitches .
And the most disgusting part is , They're dating in front of my most respectful god in the world-Buddha .
How dare you all ?!
That's a place for you to learn , NOT TO DATE FOR GOD DAMN SAKE !
And there's one person , which I hated the most in the entire camp named X琪玲 . She's like the most irritating person in the universe !
She's like keep on ordering me to do stuff .
Didn't even bother to say please or whatsoever .
Where's your freaking manners dude ?
Don't your parents taught you how to become a PERSON ?!
Fuck you , seriously .
And you're like going to be a Form 1 student only when you're 14 . I'm soon to be 16 . ONE SIX ! REMEMBER THAT !

And you , seriously , You made me do this .
I know you hated it to the limit but I'm doing this probably because , This will be the last time if I'm not mistaken .
We're not gonna be friends anymore and I don't blog stuff about strangers .
No , We're not even strangers .
Get that ?!
You're such a jerk who needs to get your brain washed .
It's like you don't even know how to spell the word CARE .
I care about you . Well , at least used to care about you .
But You don't bother at all do you ?
Hello , I'm not freaking transparent .
I don't eat glasses .
I'm a solid human being typing this shit for you to read so you would know how much I hate you right now .
You're so hating me but I DON'T CARE ! Since someone don't even bother to type a YES word .
The reason I like him so much is Because he's much more mature mentally and physically comparing to you , the Soon to be a 16 year old childish boy who doesn't bother to grow up and be a MAN .
Another reason is he's a polite , nice and totally a gentleman kinda guy .
And you're completely the OPPOSITE !
So , just say bye to our so called friendship , cause I don't think I want it anymore .
Lastly , just get a life ,KJ !

I know you'll be thinking How childish is this free bitch . But I seriously don't care . I'm an emotional person and I blog what I feel . I don't regret what I blog and I seriously won't delete every single post I blogged .Get that ? Good .

*Whenever I saw the wallpaper on my phone , I smile .
He's the reason I'm smiling right now . =)

200th post . =)

2009-12-08T15:29:00.002+08:00

The 200th post !=)
Celebrated Mixu's birthday yesterday .
It was fun and totally crazy !
Once again , HAPPY BIRTHDAY BAFFALO LEE ! <3

Came back from the most boring camp I've ever been .
I wanted to come back on the second day but Qian stopped me from doing that so .
I'm so proud of myself cause I've been very patient with them .

And I'm not gonna get him . Not now . Maybe two years later . When I'm mature enough to be in a relationship . =).

K , maybe you're hating me now . You thought I was playing your feelings but I'm not . First you ignored me , then we're being honest with each other . But now , my prefect guy appears . And now , 99% you're hating me right now . Why ? Now I'm asking you why . You're not giving me answers . At least I did gave you answers . You're so selfish you know that .

HAPPY 200TH POST , BLOG ! <3

Camp .

2009-12-04T10:31:00.003+08:00

I'm going to camp in about 2 hours time and I just feel like posting this before I go .
(As you know , I'm obsessed with Blogging for a long time.)
Am so excited now . Cause I haven't done the whole camp thingy for a while .
Kinda miss it though .
Hope the new batch of OC there won't be so bitchy like the last batch .
Well , Am a bit afraid of it .
Cause I don't usually talk much in camps .
But I'll try to make some new and truthful friends . Or not ?
LOL .
Pray for me bloggies .

Btw , I'm missing you more than ever now . =)

See you on MONDAY , ALL OF YOU . =D

Satellite Heart by Anya Marina

2009-12-03T21:50:00.001+08:00

Another Twilight Saga : New Moon SONG .
Enjoy ! Especially PINKFISH !

Tagged by JOEE ! <3

2009-12-03T19:21:00.004+08:00

ABC About You Questions:

A - AVAILABLE: Totally .
B - BIRTHDAY: 19th of September .
C - CRUSHIN ON: The TL = S .
D - DRINK YOU LAST HAD: Cincau .
E - EASIEST PERSON TO TALK TO: Myself .
F - FAVORITE SONG: Never Knew I Needed .
G - GUMMY BEARS OR GUMMY WORMS: Gummy Bears .
H - HOMETOWN: Ipoh .
I - IN LOVE WITH: Taylor Lautner and S(Almost) ! <3
J - JUGGLE: LOL . No way .
K - KILLED SOMEONE: Nope .
L - LONGEST CAR RIDE: 10 hours .
M- MILKSHAKE FLAVOR: Strawberry .
N - NUMBER OF SIBLINGS: 3 .
O - ONE WISH: To be his best friend and eventually L when I'm 17 . =)
P - PERSON YOU CALLED LAST: Sin Weng .
R - REASON TO SMILE: Thrilled ! =)
S - SONG YOU LAST HEARD: Fame(Remember my name) . =(
T - TIME YOU WOKE UP: 9.00a.m .
U - UNDERWEAR COLOR/PATTERN: It's in my closet . Shhh .
V - VEGETABLE(S): Bean Sprouts .
W - WORST HABIT: Too emotional . (Everybody's nodding their heads.)
X - X-RAYS YOU'VE HAD: Oral X-RAYS ?
Y – YOYOS ARE: For kids ?

Random Questions About You:

Spell your name without vowels: TH JN Y .
What color do you wear most?: Grey .
Least favorite color?: Orange .
What are you listening to?: Empire state of mind .
Are you happy with your life right now?: Totally .
What is your favorite class in school?: Music .
When do you start back at school/college?: 2010 .
Are you outgoing?: Yea . That's what legs are for .
Favorite pair of shoes?: Converse .
Where do you wish you were right now?: Places where I can see him .

THE CANS:

Can you dance?: Yea .
Can you tie a cherry stem with your mouth?: No . Who can BTW ?
Can you whistle?: Not really .
Write with both hands?: No . It's hard to write with my left hand .
Walk with your toes curled?: Yea I guess so . LOL

THE DO'S:

Do you believe there is life on other planets?: Totally . It's fun to meet them .
Do you believe in miracles?: YES YES YES YES YES ! =D
Do you believe in magic?: Yea . Why not ?
Love at first sight?: For the Zillion Times , YES ! (I don't believe it back then , but when it happen to myself , I believe it now !)=)
Do you believe in Satan?: No way I'll say yes !
Do you believe in Santa?: Yes !
Do you know how to swim?: Lol . Totally . It's easy . (Specially for PINKFISH)
Do you like roller coasters?: Sometimes ? LOL .
Do you think you could handle the stuff they eat on those reality shows?: Eww . Disgusting !

THE HAVES:

Have you ever been on a plane?: Yes .
Have you ever asked someone out?: Yea . I'm the one who's planning hang outs for my friends . Cause obviously I'm good at it . =p
Have you ever been asked out by someone?: Yes . =)
Have you ever been to the ocean?: Yes . Totally FUN .
Have you ever painted your nails?: Yes . When I'm not in a good mood .

THE WHATS:

What is the temperature outside?: Who knows ?
What radio station do you listen to?: Hitz.fm .
What was the last restaurant you ate at?: Sushi King .
What was the last thing on TV you watched?: Music Videos .

THE WHOS:

Who was the last person you IM'd: Yea, IM ? No idea .
Who was the last person you took a picture of?: Sister ! <3
Who was the last person you said I love you to?: Taylor Lautner ! <3

CRYING SECTION:

Ever really cried your heart out?: Yes ! All the time .
Ever cried yourself to sleep?: Yea . That happened quite a lot of times .
Ever cried on your friend's shoulder?: Yea .
Ever cried over the opposite sex?: Erm . Yes ? LOL .
Do you cry when you get an injury?: Depends .
Do certain songs make you cry?: Yes .

HAPPY SECTION:

Are you a happy person?: I could be very happy sometimes . =D
What /who can make you happy?: Taylor Lautner and S of course .
Do you wish you were happier?: Only if he texted me . =)
Can music make you happy?: Some music .

LOVE SECTION:

How many times have you had your heart broken?: Four .
Have you ever loved someone so much that you'd die for them?: Hell NO .

LOOK AT ME:

What is your current hair color?: Black .
Current piercings?: None .
Have any tattoos?: Totally Nope .
Eye color?: Black . But I prefer brown . Like Taylor's . ^^

IN A BOY/GIRL:

Favorite eye color : Brown .
Short or long hairs: Long .
Best clothing: Anything that looks good on me .

HAVE YOU EVER:

Been to jail: Of course NOT and never will be .
Mooned someone: Nope .
Laughed so hard you cried: Yes ! LOL .
Cried in school: Yes .
Thrown up in a store: Eww . Nope .
Done something really stupid that you still laugh at today: Yes. LOL . Stupid me .
Gone skinny dipping: I hope so .

THIS OR THAT:

Pepsi or Coke: Fattening . NO !
McDonald's or Burger King: McDonald of course .
Single or Group Dates: Group dates . Cause It's fun ! =D
Chocolate or Vanilla: Vanilla . Not so fattening .
Strawberries or Blueberries: Strawberries ! <3
Meat or Veggies: Veggies .
TV or Movie: I like them both .
Guitar or Drums?: Both . =)
Adidas or Nike: A-D-I-D-A-S !
Chinese or Mexican: Chinese .
Cheerios or Corn Flakes: Corn Flakes . =)
Cake or Pie: Both ! YUM !

Tag :
Everyone who's boring enough to do this tag . Enjoy ! =)

Wednesday (2/12)

2009-12-02T13:53:00.006+08:00

Well , one week had passed by .
Still , I miss it so much .
It's a boring day just facing the plasma TV the whole day .
BTW , FB told me I have only 16% of luck today .
So , I'm just gonna be a good girl staying at home today .
In case anything bad happen to me . Lol

Bro is finally coming back today , with tonnes of presents . =D
I miss him so much .
He'd missed my show .
But , never mind .
At least I still have my presents . =D

Since he's coming back , I cooked mac and cheese and guess what , It's Y-U-M-M-Y !
Finally , I cooked it deliciously . LOL .
P.S : Got this recipe from my aunt . =P

Bon appetit ! ;)

BTW , finish Grey's Anatomy season 5 in a day . =.=

Thank you , biatch . =)

2009-12-01T22:51:00.003+08:00

I'm like really happy right now .
And thanks to you , my BFF whom I really love and hate(because she's always bullying me).
Thanks for always comforting me and being by my side when I needed you the most or when I don't need you the most .
You're great .
You're beyond great .
You are the kinda friend I need forever .
You created miracles !
And don't you ever leave me like Kelly Pang did .
I don't want any of my best friends to leave me no more .
So , be my bitch forever !
You know I love you more . <3

BTW , I like him more and more now . =)

It's always about her , isn't it ?

2009-12-01T15:36:00.002+08:00

Okay , I've done this last year and I can't believe I'm doing this again .
Why her ?
Always her .
Everybody likes her more .
Everybody will choose her over me .
I waited for two and a half weeks for his text and she just got his post so easily .
I've really fallen for him .
And I asked every single of my friends , they said she's better than me .
Yea , she's better than me . So what ?
I will be better than her . Someday , I will .

She told me she admire him . And now she don't like the HIM anymore , I'm so afraid I'm gonna hate her again you know . I don't like hating my BFF . It sucks . But meantime , I really want him and envy her . These cover everything up . It almost cover our friendship up . I can't do this anymore . I can't stalk him and her on FB everyday just to get myself updated . And I can't watch the movie over and over again just to pretend I'm seeing him every single day . I'm just being stupid and pathetic and whatever that word is . Urgh . Don't do that to me ! Everyone ! Finding someone to talk about it and they ended up talking about her . I'm really pissed about it ! About her and about everything ! I can't chill . Not right now . Cause everything just falls apart .

For the record , I really like him . And for the record , I'm telling everybody I AM GONNA BE FREAKING BETTER THAN HER !

AMCCO .

2009-11-27T23:46:00.002+08:00

Seriously , I miss those days in AMCCO .
I'm still in love with it .
Maybe Ms Quah had already kick me out .
But she can't stop me from loving what I love - Being apart of AMCCO .

I gave up in this year's competition all just for the show .
I didn't realize I miss both show and competition so much .
Show-
What did I get at last ?
To perform on stage . And I did it !
But nobody realize who I am except my BFF's . (They are the best of the best !<3)
AMCCO-
They got 2 GOLD MEDALS ! =) I'm proud of them !
If I were there participating in the competition , I will still be happy by now . I won't miss the competition so much .

Just wondering , who am I in all of your hearts ?
A good daughter ? A good student ? A great performer ? A music lover ? BFF ? Friends with benefits ? Just a friend ? Enemy ? Total stranger ? or just Nothing ?
I have to know . Cause I've this kinda feelings that people are lying ... Again .
And I hate liars(Like everybody don't know that .)

Being truthful to me is my No.1 rule if you want to be my friend .

EMO-ing . Again .

25th of November 2009 =)

2009-11-26T23:44:00.023+08:00

Aww . What a memorable day . I am never ever gonna forget the day . It MAY BE my last show . For the first time of my 12 years of performing , I don't feel nervous on stage at all .
I'm just so loving 25th of November ! So in love with it ! <3

Pictures , you may start talking now .
*Last photo ? My one and only picture in the booklet . LOL .
=)

Show time ! =D

2009-11-25T00:30:00.002+08:00

19 hours till show time !
Am so exciting about it .
It's like time really do flies .
A month ago , I was taking my PMR examination and now the show day has arrive .
Hope nothing goes wrong .
For those who are watching , enjoy it ! It will make all of you say WOW!
All the best to me , bloggies . =)
When dreams come true .
Venue : SUK banquet hall , ipoh
date :25th of nov '09
time :8pm sharp .

Devastated .

2009-11-24T11:12:00.002+08:00

Got informed by teacher that she's cutting one of our dances .
I was like , Seriously ?
That was like my best dance in the show . That's the dance I can beat her . I can stand in front of thousands of people and perform ... better than her .
But it doesn't matter now .
Dreamt of a new dance routine for the song last night and when I woke up I was like , Let's do this !
But , what if I fix it and teacher rejected ?
No point at all .
So , I'm trying my best not to feel sad about it .

And I think he likes her . =(

Btw , Thanks Agnes Voon ! For accompanying me yesterday night . I know we're just crapping around but I felt comfortable crapping with you ! <3

New Moon countdown - 2 days left !

Caught in a Bad Romance ~

2009-11-19T23:56:00.002+08:00

Just <3 every single hits sang by LADY GA~GA~ . =D

New Moon ~

2009-11-19T23:25:00.003+08:00

Finally , New Moon is now showing on Theater !
Nah , not in M'sia .
M'sia is way too outdated .
Please !
I ain't waiting no more .
(I'm definitely not a big fan of patient .)
Still , I'll be a good girl and wait for it .(For Taylor's sake<3)

Knew that Borders is now selling New Moon's t-shirt !
Me and Pinkfish were THRILLED ! Finally , we are going to get what we wanted !
Pinkfish , I'm going back on the 27th of November . I'll buy for you and that's 100% for sure . But I can't watch New Moon with you . What about after we done our PPS stuff ? Heard someone said:"New Moon AKAN keluar pada 26/11". Lol . Reply ASAP ! <3

Seriously , I've completely fallen for the fake Taylor Lautner ! <3

<3

2009-11-17T23:06:00.001+08:00

I don’t know but
I think I maybe
Fallin’ for you
Dropping so quickly
Maybe I should
Keep this to myself
Waiting ’til I
Know you better

I am trying
Not to tell you
But I want to
I’m scared of what you’ll say
So I’m hiding what I’m feeling
But I’m tired of
Holding this inside my head

I’ve been spending all my time
Just thinking about ya
I don’t know what to do
I think I’m fallin’ for you
I’ve been waiting all my life
and now I found ya
I don’t know what to do
I think I’m fallin’ for you
I’m fallin’ for you

As I’m standing here
And you hold my hand
Pull me towards you
And we start to dance
All around us
I see nobody
Here in silence
It’s just you and me

Oh I just can’t take it
My heart is racing
The emotions keep spinning out

I can’t stop thinking about it
I want you all around me
And now I just can’t hide it
I think I’m fallin’ for you

P.S/I'VE FALLEN FOR YOU . <3

XUAN <3

2009-11-16T22:22:00.001+08:00

I JUST LOVE HER OH-SO-MUCH !<3

MY GIRL SINGGING IN AMC IDOL . <3

2009-11-16T22:17:00.001+08:00

She's the one and only LEE VOON WOOI AKA BAFFALO LEE .
She sang well and I'm proud of her .
ILYF <3

I found him ! <3

2009-11-15T21:02:00.003+08:00

OMG OMG OMG AND OMG !
I found him !
My dream guy !
You all probably will be asking :" I thought you said your dream guy is TAYLOR LAUTNER ?"
Yes , he definitely is .
And I surely found my dream guy .
He looks like Taylor a lot .
The two things that he's different with Taylor are he's a Malaysian and his hair style is different .
Omg .
Like Kelly Pang said , I sure will fall for him sooner or later . And I totally agree with her .
I had a crush on him already !!!
"So Sorry K but you're still in my heart . Never will be replaced .<3"
I had a crush on you , S !

P.S / I will be seeing you the next whole week . Can't wait !=D
<3

Oh my taylor .

2009-11-09T22:21:00.008+08:00

I'm so obsessed with this charming person !
Just can't get my eyes off him .
Every time I watch his video , picture or whatever , I found myself almost bursting into tears .
Oh Taylor , my Taylor .
I love you more than anyone could imagine . <3

Happy Birthday Big Bro <3

2009-11-07T23:51:00.019+08:00

First of all , HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY , TEH JUN XIAN ! <3
Finally you're officially an adult .
You can go to PUB , go CLUBBING with your friends , watch 18PL or SL movies (although I watched them like all the time ) .
You're the other man in our family now .
BE A REAL MAN ! YOU KNOW ILYF ! <3

Second of all , I AM FEELING DAMN GOOD SINCE YESTERDAY .
At least I know how you feel about me now and I can stop thinking about those ridiculous thoughts that's in my heads for weeks .
I'm smiling when I'm typing this . =)

Lastly , PICTURES !

My Dinner @ Folie-Folie . <3 kiwi smoothies . *_*

Nah , Your Treat !

Jennifer's Body . So into MEGAN and AMANDA right now . And it's scary .
P/S : Lil sis and I kept on hiding our faces when Jen is "killing" boys again .

Tokio Hotel 's World Behind My Wall

2009-11-06T12:30:00.001+08:00

Performing @ EMA BERLIN '09 .

MTV World Stage-LIVE IN ATHENS . =)

LOVIN' TOKIO HOTEL'S AMAZING MUSIC ! <3

EMA BERLIN '09 .

2009-11-06T10:10:00.002+08:00

Skipped school today just for this - EMA BERLIN '09 !!!
IT IS A FUCKING KISS ASS MUSIC AWARD SHOW .
Hosted by one of my fav , KATY PERRY !!!

Am so fucking lovin' it ! <3

When Dreams Come True .

2009-11-04T17:57:00.002+08:00

Come and Support us .
I'm performing btw . =)